I am hating life at the moment. So, last night I went to get a massage. I got a pre-natal massage where they have you laying on your side instead of on your tummy. Then last night (after 3 weeks of glorious blood free days!) I got brown spotting. It's still here this morning. I am so worried. Did I kill my baby by getting a massage? Am I about to end this wonderful dream? I called my OB and am waiting for the nurse to call me back. The spotting is brown and sludge-like and not very much . I have no cramps. To try to ease my mind I pulled out my little home doppler and heard the magical heart beat going at 154bpm. It was awesome. So...essentially I don't think baby is dead ....but I do think something is wrong that can lead to my poor little one leaving us! I hate this stress! So please, cross your fingers that the nurse actually calls me back before I go insane and also that this stupid brown spotting is ok.
Sorry for the downer post. I feel shit.