Sleep is always a popular topic with new moms. Obviously we enter motherhood knowing we will be sleep deprived. Now, for me at the beginning (maybe first week or 2) I did not feel tired. I know I was EXHAUSTED but I was running on pure adrenaline and hormones. As the weeks went on, the tiredness, and accompanying BITCHINESS came into full effect. I was mean. I was sooooo tired. I dreaded the nights, I knew I would be lying awake, watching the baby, soothing the baby, feeding the baby while my husband snored next to me with his earplugs in.
Now, here's where I have to make a confession. I was sleeping with my baby in my bed. Cuddled right next to me. I never planned on being a co-sleeper. We had bought a travel crib to go beside our bed and that was where I envisioned the baby sleeping. In fact, I was definitely one of those women who thought people who co-slept were "stupid" and making bad parenting decisons. Well, the first night in the hospital the baby slept in her hospital bassinet...like a baby! Then the second night...she cried. and cried. and cried. and all that soothed her was to sleep in the bed with me. And so began our co-sleeping.
We came home and I continued to bring the baby to bed with me and cradle her until she fell asleep and then lay her down beside me to sleep. I would wake up a zillion times a night because my baby is a GRUNTER and it is LOUD! I also wasn't swaddling her so she was flailing around like crazy. I would wake up to her noises, her movements and if it wasn't one of those two reasons, I would wake up because my arm would be completely numb since I was sleeping on it and too scared to change positions in order to not wake the baby.
Now, even though I was not sleeping well, I was convinced that putting the baby in the crib would be worse because she would NOT sleep. I envisioned putting her in only to encounter a massive crying, screaming fit! Afterall, my baby NEEDED me! I would rather have woken up to a numb arm or a few grunts than upset her and have to repeatedly get up to soothe her crying. I also have to admit that I LOVED the smell, the feel, the closeness of having her right next to me all night long. Afterall, she was right beside (ok...inside!) me for 40 weeks! It was tough to imagine her not connected to me!
Well, last week I decided to try out the bassinet. I bought a swaddle that was recommended to me by a lady at my mom-group. It's called the Miracle Blanket. And let me say...it is just that! Alexandra loves to flail her arms around and easily busts out of many swaddles we already have. Those velcro ones have no chance! So, I swaddled her up TIGHT. Really tight is the key. I felt bad doing it, its like putting your baby in a straight jacket! Of course she screamed. and I figured she would be unswaddled and in my bed in no time. But after a few minutes of shhhing and rocking she was out cold. I put her in the crib, and she slept. For FOUR hours. and I slept for FOUR hours! When she woke up, i didn't unswaddle her ( I was warned not to unswaddle her!) and I fed her and she was back in the crib and asleep 30 minutes after waking. and so was I. She slept for another 3 hours after that! holy smokes! I woke up refreshed! a new woman! and we have not looked back since! Quitting co-sleeping has changed my life! I don't dread the night time, i can actually "put her to bed", it gives me a tiny bit of freedom that i didn't recognize i needed! I know there willl still be rough nights but man oh man am i happy i tried something that i was so afraid of! i'm really proud of us!
LTB
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You sounds like a totally new women. I am so happy for you. You deserve a break.
ReplyDeleteI must admit, the "husband snored next to me with his earplugs in" annoyed me so I can only imagine how you feel. :)
so glad you found something that gets you more sleep! I will have to register for one of those miracle blankets :)
ReplyDeleteYour first paragraph is exactly how I feel. The first week and a half I was not tired AT ALL. I would get like 3-4 hours a day if I was lucky. At night when she was asleep I would watch tv because I wasn't tired. Now I'm starting to come down off that high.
ReplyDeleteI have been loosely swaddling her....but not the arms. She is an arm flailer...but at night it doesnt seem to bother her too much. She sleeps for about 2.5-3.5 hour stretches at night now so it isn't too bad. Last night I got out a Swaddle Me blanket and put her in it. I didnt have the heart to keep her in it though. Her arms were stuck to her sides and it made me feel awful. I know it won't hurt her...but I couldnt handle it. I had to take it off her. I kept thinking I was constricting her breathing. If her hands start waking her up in the middle of the night then I will try it again though. Like I said before I know the blanket won't hurt her...but it is a mommy guilt issue with me I guess.
Yay momma!
ReplyDeleteGood for you!
I will admit....it's been the same for us. Little Sloan loves to cuddle with her mama and gets the best sleep that way. But the other night, I broke out our Swaddle Me blanket that is almost the same as the one you have. And yes! She slept for 4 hours! And after feeding, another 4!
Regular swaddling didn't work for us either because she loves to have her arms free but the Swaddle Me keeps her in so tight, it's awesome!
Aren't those tastes of sleep so sweet? Just wait until she starts sleeping through the night! You'll feel like a brand new woman!
ReplyDeleteLove your new blog heder!!! Love how the name of your blog matches little A perfectly!!! Thank you so much for sharing your birth story!!! And even tho my heart rate rises a little bit learning about the challenging early weeks, it is so great to hear what's working for you. Swaddle away!!! xoxo
ReplyDeleteI've heard such great things about the miracle blanket. Nice to hear another success story! And thanks for honestly sharing what these first few weeks are like. It helps people like me mentally prepare!
ReplyDeleteWooHoo on getting more sleep! The same thing was happening here and I HATED to swaddle Alex in one of those straight jackets. But out of desperation, we got some of the swaddle me blankets at Target. The first night I tried it sounds exactly like your night with your baby. It was glorious! Now Alex sleeps for one 7 hour stretch and one 4 hour stretch with only waking up once in the night. It's fabulous!! I hope she keeps on sleeping better and better for you. One day these babies will STTN for us.
ReplyDeleteGood for you! What a great feeling that first night must have been. My little guy is 3 months and I still swaddle him at nights. I do so because he sleeps for 8 hours when I do! I let him nap without the swaddle so he can learn so stay asleep when he flings his arms around, but he still wakes up a lot. I'm nervous about when to make the switch from swaddling to un-swaddling but for now....he sleeps so I sleep!
ReplyDeleteYay four hours of sleep!!!! That's awesome!
ReplyDeleteObsessed with the miracle blanket!!! Our little peanut totally needs to be swaddled REAL tight too and then she's out! I feel so bad and am always telling hubby to make sure its not too tight, he's the pro swaddler cause I make mine too loose! So glad you're getting some sleep finally. We did the co-sleeping the first couple nights home from the hospital, which on one hand I loved snuggling with her but also needed my sleep too. Totally hear ya you don't realize how bad you need it until you actually get some! Now I just pull her into bed with me after our morning feeding when hubby goes to work, and we snuggle all morning!! LOVE it!
ReplyDeleteAnother great resource is Happiest baby on the block video. It saved us.
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