I have dropped off the face of the earth. Apparently blogging with a new born and Christmas is proving too much for me! I'm reading though (mostly while breastfeeding!) And I miss you guys!
So....Alexandra is 15 days old now. I love her more than I thought possible to love ANYONE! My fears of not loving her like every other mother describes evaporated the instant I heard her first cry and kissed her cheek. She is a precious, beautiful angel and my heart melts when I look at her.
I was VERY emotional for the first week (ok...i'm still really emotional) after she was born. I cried EVERYDAY. But they were tears of overwhelming love. Seriously, I was so overwhelmed with emotion and the only way I knew to deal was to cry! And of course, i have already started crying about her growing up too fast! I haven't been feeling sad or depressed at all which was another one of my fears so that is good. But that being said, it has been a super busy time with lots of visitors and fun times. Reality will set in come January when everyone is back to work adn its just me and A at home alone.
We have already been out a bunch of times. Walks to the coffee shop, grocery store, and even to a friend's birthday party when she was 5 days old. She does great in the stroller, car seat and loved the party (ie. she slept the entire time! )
The one thing I'm struggling with is a bit of resentment of the hubs. He sleeps 8 hours straight everynight. I sleep in 2 hour stretches. I am exhausted and I sometimes want to kill him when my alarm goes off to feed her at 3am and I look over to see him snoring like a bear. ..... errrr.
He is off work now until next week so part of me is pissed that he gets to sleep and he doesn't even have to get up for work. But really, there is no point in him getting up since i'm the one with the boobs. Speaking of boobs...woah...I've got BOOBS! And lots of milk, like running down my stomach and soaking through 2 shirts! crazy!
Also, had a few battles with hubs over his soccer games, parties for work, and his "need" to workout . All of these make me pissed since I'm at home, in pain (episiotomy...OUCH!) , and not allowed to work out or do anything for 6 weeks. I don't want to leave my baby girl either and i just don't get how he can even want to do all of those things rather than spend every free second with Alexandra. I think a mother's love is deeper than the fathers right at the beginning. But I see him getting more attached and being "better" with her everyday. His love is growing.
Anyways, little A is beckoning so I must got and whip out a boob for her! I will post the birth story and more photos later!
Miss you all and hope you are having a great holiday!
LTB
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I'm so impressed you've been out so many times already! That's awesome!
ReplyDeleteAnd sorry about your hubs, hopefully he steps up and gets on the daddying train soon :(
So glad you and A are doing so great!
ReplyDeleteSorry about hubs...doesn't seem that uncommon to be on different wavelengths in the beginning. I'm sure he'll come around.
So good to hear from you and to know that things are going so wonderfully. I think the resentment of the hubs is normal. My guys still never gets up to feed Isa, even though we're weaning her and it will be bottles soon. It's just so much easier for me to get up and stick a boob in her mouth than for him to get up and make a bottle (which takes him 5 TIMES LONGER than it takes me). So I just do it. Plus, he deals with the lack of sleep worse than I do. So I take that one for the team. He makes it up to me in other ways.
ReplyDeletePlease post more pictures of your little angle. She is just too cute!
So glad to hear an update and know that things are going well with you and baby A. I can imagine that the frustration with the hubs will continue until you're feeling 100% and more free to do the things you enjoy as well. Hope you guys find a way that evens out the workload a bit and helps you not resent him :-).
ReplyDeleteGood to hear from you! Seems like you are doing a fantastic job Mommy :)
ReplyDeleteMy DH was like that too, would not get up when our baby cried {and we are formula feeding} but now that I'm working, he's getting up every so often. Believe me...it'll take time.
And I agree with Esperanza - post some more pics...when you have time of course!
Well I certainly hear you about being gone for awhile. I cannot believe I have been gone so long that I have not even been able to tell you congratulations!!!!! And my baby is not even here yet! Congrats Momma!
ReplyDeleteI can just hear the love for your miracle pouring from your words. She is a very lucky little girl!
I think it is a little different for guys than it is women. At least that is what I have heard. Once your baby is more interactive I bet that baby girl will be wrapped around his little finger!
I cannot wait to see new pics!! Hint hint :O)
I resented my DH SO much for the first 6 weeks or so... As much as he claimed he was comfortable caring for the baby, I don't think he really was, because I rarely got help. (And when I did leave Liam at home with him while I went out, I always worried that he wasn't being taken care of.) BUT, I noticed a huge change starting around 6 weeks-- once Liam started smiling and cooing and laughing, DH seemed more interested in spending time with him. Then, I didn't worry so much and I wasn't AS resentful.
ReplyDelete(Although, I'm still resentful that he's slept until 2pm much of our Christmas vacation after staying up until 3am playing video games. Ask me how many mornings I've slept in while he got up with Liam... That's right, none.{sigh})
Glad to hear things are going well! I'm jealous of how much you have gone out! We are stuck inside until mid January!! Can't wait to hear your birth story!
ReplyDeleteI suspect that the husband issue you're having is all too common. For some reason people just don't talk about it as much as they should. I hope it works itself out.
ReplyDeleteI just can't quit looking at her sweet little face in your last post. Are you just dying with how cute she is??
Congratulations on your new baby, She is beautiful. Thank you for your honesty with this post.
ReplyDeleteI have been up almost all night and finally woke the hubs up to change a diaper. With my c-section it's hard to get up so I figure it's the least he can do. I completely undertand the resentment though.
ReplyDeleteKeep up the good work momma!
Congrats on your little girl. Thanks for the update - and for your honesty! It's so good to hear how things are going. I'm sure your husband will fall more and more in love with her but I can only imagine how freaking frustrating that would be!!
ReplyDeleteSo very happy for you.