Littlest True Blue

Time goes by...

2012-01-17T13:16:00.000-08:00

far, far too quickly! I can't believe its been over a month since I last posted and since my baby's first birthday! Christmas has come and gone, and was wonderful. New Years was fine but forcetd this pregnant momma to stay up far too late! So, yes, my baby girl is now 13 months and her little fetal sibling is now 10 weeks and growing strong (according to last weeks ultrasound). I have "graduated" from the RE and head to the OB for my first appointment next Friday.

That's not the only excitement in these parts though. We get our new house this weekend! OMG! I'm feeling excited and sad about moving. We are moving out of the city. I love the city. I have a nice routine here, I have mom friends, I have something fun for Alexandra to do every single day. We go swimming, we go to mom and baby drop in centres for hours of fun (and FREE!), we go to reading group at the library and play dates at friends houses. I will not have these things at my new place. I know I'll eventually be able to build new friendships and find stuff to do (its not like we are moving to a small town or the country so I know there are lots of things to do...just takes work to find it). We are comfortable here. And change is always scary. I know the move is for the best for our family. Our new house is amazing. Such a great place for kids to grow up. Lots of room for dog to run and play. Closer to our families. But its still bitter sweet. I will try to keep in touch with my city mom friends and invite them for playdates at our new house, but lets be honest...its a 25 minute drive from the city...that will only be fun once or twice. I'll try to come into the city a couple times a month as well.

This weekend we have a TON of new furniture being delivered to the new house before we move in next week. We basically bought all new furniture. 2 leather couches, coffee table, big screen tv, tv stand, dining table and 8 chairs, kitchen table and 4 chairs, king bed and new bedroom set, elliptical machine for our home gym....woah....

But its going to be an easy move going from a 1200 sq foot condo to a much bigger place. lots more room to hide/stash stuff !ha ha!

Anyways I hope to have some pics of our new house and my adorable walking machine daughter soon !

Happy Wednesday!

LTB

Those two lines...

2011-12-14T05:52:00.001-08:00

I saw them last week (Mon December 5th to be exact) and they are a beautiful sight . I'm pregnant!!! I did an injectible cycle followed by IUI. It was so much easier this time than in the past. I only had to take injects for one week...in the past I had to inject (on much higher doses) for over 2 weeks! I only had one day of monitoring and I had one follicle ready to go! So, hubs and I went in the next two mornings and did back to back iui. Then the two week wait went by so much faster than in the past...obviously because I was chasing around my little monkey and enjoying her rather than simply focusing on the "am I pregnant or not" worries! We took a pregnancy test two days before the beta, it was positive. OMG! But we thought it could still be the HCG from the trigger shot so I tested again the next day...more positive! Then beta 1 gave us a nice number of 231. Beta 2 (48 hours later) gave us more than doubling at 631! OMG! Ultrasound to detect heart beat is scheduled for December 23rd. I'm so over the moon happy, so over the moon TIRED, and so over the moon scared that we won't see what we want on the 23rd. But all in all, I feel so much less pressure than in past infertility treatment cycles since I am so thrilled that I already have my angel who I love more than life. I'm hoping and praying that all goes well and this little baby keeps growing in my belly. This is love. xo

Party Pics

2011-12-12T15:55:00.000-08:00

Woah!!! All these presents are for ME!!!!

Mommy! I love this teddy bear!!!

MMMMM... presents AND cake!!!

Now that my belly is full I'm ready to relax in my new rocking chair!

I think I like birthdays!

One Year...

2011-12-12T05:55:00.000-08:00

It's been one year of laughs, tears, sleepless nights, cuddles, diapers, lots of crying and an abundance of LOVE. One year ago today my heart exploded. I fell in love beyond what I imagined I was capable. Happy Birthday to my precious princess. This year has been the best of my life. THE BEST.

At one year Alexandra:
-crawls all over, climbs up on everything (stairs, furniture, boxes...) and has taken one or two nervous steps.
-is just not quite confident to walk, I think she could but she's scared, and she's good at crawling so why bother!
-finally will eat off a spoon, but still prefers finger foods
-is extremely picky eater and basically eats the same thing everyday despite my efforts
-drinks whole milk like its no big deal (one question...did anyone else's kids poo get more runny when you made the switch from formula to milk? Also the colour is much lighter than her formula poo....?)
-has 7 teeth and the 8th on the way
-says mama....mostly when she's whining
-babbles all the time. She is LOUD!
-loves books. All books. They taste good...oh and the flaps on the peekaboo books are so fun to rip off! ha ha! She loves turning the pages and pointing at stuff in the books and listening to us read them. My little literary buff.
-sleeps great at night 8pm-7am
-takes 2 naps. one around 9:30 for about an hour and one around 2:15 for about 1 to 1.5 hours. All sleeping is in the crib.
-HATES the car. Screaming battles in the car are always guaranteed.
-HATES the stroller. I'm lucky if I get 10 minutes of peace when I attempt to walk with her in the stroller. My left bicep is huge. Carrying her is getting very difficult as she is definitely atleast 20 pounds now!
-will hopefully (fingers crossed that all goes well and i'm not jinxing anything by putting this out there....) be a BIG SISTER in August 2012!!!!

What a wonderful year it has been!!!

xoxo LTB
-

Woah!!!

2011-11-15T06:41:00.000-08:00

Slow down world! How is it possible that baby A is almost 1 YEAR OLD??? Where the heck has the time gone! She is so amazing and learning every day. I often find myself wishing "she could walk", or "she could talk" but then I look back at all that she has learned in her short 11 months and I feel so guilty for wishing the time away! I honestly would be happy if she would stay at this cute, smiley, crawling, cruising, getting in to everything age forever! So much fun!

Lots going on over here in the last month. I'm a bit overwhelmed with everything actually. Here are a few highlights:

1. We bought a house. Outside of the city. We bought a beautiful home Oakville (a suburb of Toronto). It is very close to the GO Train, which means my husband can easily take the train to work and avoid traffic. It will take him about 30 minutes to get to work. Not too bad considering the subway ride if we bought within the city would be almost equivalent...and grosser! I never thought I'd want to leave the city. I love our condo downtown. Then we had a baby...and got lots of baby stuff...and need more space! Like...lots more space! A yard is going to be fantastic. But I'm scared. I will no longer have everything at my fingertips. I'll have to use the car more. I have no friends in Oakville. I have no job in Oakville....which brings me to my second highlight.

2. I resigned from my teaching job. I am going to stay home with Alexandra for atleast another 9 months. The school I worked at was not near the GO station in Toronto, so the commute for me would be way too much. Not worth it. So, we decided that since we are fortunate enough to be able to have me stay home, I will do it...for a while. I'm nervous about not having a job. I loved my job. But I also love being home. And I was scared shitless about the stress of going back to work...let alone finding daycare! We were on 2 lists for a year and did not get a spot! And if day care is going to cost us $1700 a month (INSANITY!) it almost seems ridiculous to go back to work. I'd be working for pennies! So, I will likely look for work in our new town for next September...unless we are expecting another baby...which brings me to highlight #3!

3. We are back in the throws of fertility treatments. I fully weaned Alexandra about 3 weeks ago and yesterday I went back to my fertility clinic and got my meds. Yesterday i did my first injection for this cycle. We will be doing an IUI once/if my follicles grow nicely and we get a good egg ready for baby making! Please cross your fingers for us!

So....that's what I'm up to. I am still reading all of your blogs but besides dealing with the above, and now selling our condo (major pain in the ass!!!) and also working on my masters in math...I am having a hard time blogging and commenting! But I am here, and I am following you all!

xo LTB

Happy Halloween from my little pumpkin!

2011-10-31T13:09:00.000-07:00

Update

2011-09-27T11:43:00.000-07:00

I feel so in touch with the blog world because I read blogs ALL THE TIME! Yet for some reason I never drum up the energy to do my own posts. :( Bad blogger.

Alexandra is now 9 1/2 months old. She is doing great. Getting really big and really active. She has been crawling for over a month now and she now cruises everywhere along furniture, climbs up steps, walks pushing her little walker-car-thing, and is generally into everything. This kid can not sit still. She is not a cuddly one at all. Sometimes I'm sad and wish she would just cuddle in my arms but she will not sit still for a second. She's also very tempermental. Either very happy and smiley or super pissed off. She's always been like that so I guess that's just her. She can go from a huge smile to a crying mess and back to giggles within a matter of seconds! I'm definitely anticipating an emotional teenager!!

She loves playing with other kids. She hates being home alone with just mom. BORING! We go out everyday for a play date, otherwise the whining would just kill me. Good thing I have a big network of mom friends to keep me company while the kids play. There are also a lot of awesome coffee shops nearby that cater to babies/kids and have big play areas with mats and toys and slides and swings etc. Very handy!

Alexandra has 2 teeth now and by the amount of snot and drool that is coming out of that kid I swear there are more on the way but I can't spot any. We don't go to the doctor this month but if I had to guess I would say she is 18 pounds. Getting heavy to carry (and unfortunately for me she still hates the stroller). My left bicep is huge.

In my last post I talked about weaning. Well, now is the time i'm going to get serious about it. I went back to the fertility doctor today and we are good to go with trying for a second as soon as I wean her! I had blood and baseline ultrasound done today and when I want to start my protocol (menopur injections and IUI) I just call and we begin! Crazy!

I am currently nursing Alexandra in the morning, before her afternoon nap and at night. I give her two bottles of formula a day. One with lunch and one with dinner. I'm thinking that I will next cut out the feeding before her afternoon nap. I don't think I will be ready to fully wean her for a while (a month...or 2? ) but maybe in November we will be ready to start the meds. It is exciting and scary to think about the possibility of a second baby! I really hope to give Alexandra a sibling (or 2 ...or 3!) but atleast I have her no matter what!

Anyways, my teething angel is waking from her nap and sounding miserable (wish me luck! ooooohhhh the whining!!!!! Argh!) , here's a pic of my girl on the go!

BEEP BEEP!!!

Weaning

2011-09-06T12:09:00.000-07:00

I thought I wanted to nurse Alexandra for a year and then switch her directly to milk in a sippy cup, thus skipping the formula and bottle all together. Well, I'm having second thougths on that. I want to continue to give her some breast milk until atleast a year but I am feeling like such a prisoner and am ready for her to take a bottle. Until last week, my girl had NEVER taken a bottle. Utter refusal. And so, I have NEVER been away from her for longer than 3 hours when I went to get my hair done ONCE. Other than that it has been max 2 hours apart. In 9 months. That's a long time. Now, that she is crawling (yes...at 8.5 months that girl was off to the races!), sitting in my lap is SO. NOT. FUN! She is squirming and not interested in nursing. But the problem is that she is not interested in eating solid food either. Or bottles. In the past week I have been trying to get her to take breast milk or formula from a bottle once a day. I have some success when she is strapped in her carseat and I sit in the back with her. Or when she is really sleepy, but then she does this weird nursing/sipping the bottle thing. Probably not good. I should just put my boob away! I also decided to cut out night feedings completely since she was not eating during the day. That has been surprisingly successful and this weekend she actually slept from 8 pm to 8am without waking! (actually... not entirely true...when I cut out night feeds I introduced a dream feed around 1130pm so that if she wakes at night I can rest easy knowing that her tummy is full, she doesnt' wake for the dream feed though and I wish I had started that months ago!) So, this is major progress from the multiple wakings to nurse I was having just 2 weeks ago!

Most of this post is just my babbling, but I wan to know from others who have weaned, are weaning...how do you do it ? Did you cut out one feed and replace it with a bottle? Which feed is the best/easiest one to cut out? Cold turkey? Easier for you or dad to give bottle? How do you know how many ounces to give? She doesn't seem to ever want more than 2 or 3 ounces and I read about babies wanting 8 ounce bottles! Also, would love to hear how much solid food other babies are eating. she was eating a ton! but when she started crawling and got her first tooth all in the same week her appetite disappeared. Now we are lucky if we can get her to eat a couple cubes of squash and a butt ton of cheerios a day. She is obsessed with cheerios. That is one food she will always eat!

anyways, would love any advice! Hope you all had a great long weekend!

LTB

Teeth and Germs

2011-08-29T12:00:00.000-07:00

Hello hello! I can't believe the summer is almost OVER! And that means that the school year is starting, and that means I am getting WAY too close to having to go back to work! My maternity leave is over at the end of December so I will go back to teaching in January after the Christmas break. Now, I know some of you are shaking your heads and hating on me for getting a year at home with my girl and still complaining...such is one of the pleasures of living in Canada (and paying super huge amounts of taxes!!!) I think it would suck to leave your child weather they are 4 months or 4 years old!

Things have been good over here. We went on a great vacation to a resort in the Muskokas (cottage country in Ontario) and it was so fun to be there with Alexandra at 8 months old! She was loving swimming and the toys in the kids areas and it was fantastic! Soooo much better than our trip to Florida at 4.5 months! I am absolutely loving this 8 month stage. She sits, stands, moves but doesn't crawl yet. She loves toys and interacting but is not all over the place yet! Best stage so far!

One thing that is not so good about this stage is germs. She eats everything and since we go to a lot of play groups she eats toys that other kids eat. Gross. Germy. We got our first cold. It sucks to see your baby all snotty and congested. She was (and still is) congested and is having a hard time nursing. She is dripping from the nose and its gross. When she's sick I feel like I have to quarantine her from the play groups so that we don't infect everyone else. This means we are cranky and bored and stuck inside the condo. NOT FUN. Even more not fun, I got the cold. And even MORE not fun, Alexandra got her first tooth simultaneously with getting her first cold. She was MISERABLE. It was so sad! She now has one lower tooth. I was hoping for two (the whining was enough to make me dread the other 19 that still need to grow in!). With the teething/cold she started waking more often at night. Atleast 2 to 3 times a night instead of the glorious one time a night we had gotten down to! Of course when she was sick/teething I went to her and I nursed her each time she woke. Well, its been a week now. The tooth is in. The waking is continuing. Any advice on how to break this night feeding/waking habit she has gotten herself into? I am thinking that at almost 9 months old we are ready to cut out night feeds. Do most people cut them out by now? I think I'm the last one around (in my mom groups atleast!) that still nurses her baby in the middle of the night! I just don't know how to cut out the night feeds without an enormous amount of tears. She fall asleep instantly while nursing but won't fall asleep when I just comfort her in the middle of the night. I know she knows how to put herself to sleep since I always put her to bed awake for naps and at bedtime and she goes to sleep after just chatting to herself for a minute or two. I just don't get what is so different for her in the middle of the night! I know people reduce night feeds by watering down bottles/decreasing amount given but Alexandra will not take a bottle and never has.

Another thing to compound this is that I think she might be hungry since with the sick/teething she also started refusing to eat. She barely eats any solids (except for Cheerios! Which she LOVES!) and is even nursing less during the day. Such a conundrum! Do other babies lose their appetites with teething?

Anyways, that's all that's new at the LTB household! I leave you with a couple pics from our holiday!

Gotta love those thighs!!!

Daddy is so fun!!!

First Word?

2011-08-03T18:06:00.000-07:00

I don't know how to post a video on here but here is a link to my baby girl's first word! She said it and then I repeated it and now she's been saying it on her own and whenever I say it! So proud of my girl!!!

First Word

Three Randoms...

2011-07-23T14:16:00.001-07:00

1. After thinking my poor child would be swaddled for life we finally pulled the plug and let her loose. About 2 weeks ago when she was sick I didn't want her to overheat with the swaddle since she was already feverish, so I thought it a perfect time to get out of the swaddle for good. I also figured she wasn't sleeping well anyways because of being sick so it was going to make that any worse. I went out and bought an Aden and Anis thin sleep sack (they have winter ones too and I will definitely be picking one of those up in the fall!) I put her in the sack and she slept amazing! In fact, she is sleeping much better than she was with the swaddle! The wonderful thing is that now that she is hands free she can retrieve her own soother in the middle of the night. I toss her in the crib with 3 soothers and it is fantastic! She is also now a side-sleeper. So cute! It's so crazy how much she moves around in that crib now! I put her in with her head facing north and by morning she always has her head at the south end of the crib!?!

2. Baby girl loves swimming! I started taking her to "lessons" and also take her to the community pool almost everyday! It is so fun to watch her splash and kick around in the water. I am loving this age (where she can fully sit up on her own and not so fragile)! It is so fun to actually play with her!

3. I'm thinking of training to run a 5 or 10k. I do alot of cardio but almost never run. I stick to the elliptical or stairmaster usually. I decided to try running last week and I ran 3 miles (5k) on the treadmill in 25 minutes...i'm not sure if that is terrible or decent. Anyone with running experience want to tell me what a good time to strive for would be? I don't want to over-do it with the running since I'm worried about my milk supply (anyone have experience with this? does running lower your milk supply?) so I think I will just strive for running a good 5k now and then maybe a 10k when I am nursing less in the winter time. I would love any tips about running from other running mamas!

Well, those are my 3 randoms for the day! I'll leave you with a quick pic of my baby working hard:

Baby Food

2011-07-16T20:14:00.000-07:00

We started Alexandra on solids around 5.5 months. At first it was nothing more than an exercise in body painting. She would literally purse her mouth shut and grab at the spoon full of rice cereal and smear it all over her body. Cute, but nerve wracking! I made multiple attempts to feed her oatmeal or rice cereal. I was always unsuccessful. My husband found a bit more success so he became the feeder. Alexandra became comfortable eating cereal after about 3 weeks of trying it. However, she rejected any new flavours I would introduce. Hated bananas (what baby hates bananas!), hated pear sauce, hated sweet potato. I was starting to get devastated that I wouldn't get to put my Baby Bullet to good use! Then i started to realize that what Alexandra seemed to hate the most was eating off the spoon. I started giving her chunks of watermelon or apricots and she seemed to do a bit better sucking/gnawing on those than eating them in pureed form. I just wasn't really all that comfortable with giving her "chunks" of food. I contemplated maybe just doing baby-led weaning but I was a bit nervous about it. Then I saw some other bloggers talking about Baby Gourmet organic baby food pouches. I bought a couple and Alexandra would suck the food right out of the pouch. Suddenly, without the spoon in the way, my baby girl was loving these new flavours! I was so happy, but very disappointed that maybe I wouldn't get to make all of my daughters food because I would have to resort to buying these "pouches" in order to get her to eat! Then I was struck by some mommy-genius (ok...not really but I am proud of my "invention"!) I put some pureed sweet potato in a ziploc bag, snipped off on corner and squeezed the food into baby A's mouth. She loved it just as much as the Baby Gourmet! I have now found a wonderful (non-messy! very portable!) way to feed my baby without the spoon that she for some strange reason hates! So far some homemade combo favorites include:

Mango Chicken
Banana, blueberry, avocado
Squash and green bean
Chicken and pear
Chicken, blueberry, apple

And let me tell you...my child loves to eat! At 7 months she finally "gets it!" and she loves it! And I love it...because ever since she really started eating she is SLEEPING much better! And we all know that is what really counts! She is sleeping pretty regularily from 7:30 or 8pm until 4 am, up for a quick 5 min feed and down again until 8 am. Of course there are still some terrible days but she has officially weaned herself down from 2 night feeds to one. I'm sure I could pop the soother in her mouth at 4 am and she would go a few more hours without a feed, but right now (since I don't have to get up for work) I would rather feed her at 4am, and then get another good stretch out of her until 8 than not feeding her and have her wake up for the day at 6:30 or 7.

I hope you are all having a wonderful weekend! We are going to a friend's pool tomorrow and I can't wait to get A into the pool in her new floatation device (its like an inner tube that she sits in)!

:)LTB

Bad Weekend :(

2011-07-05T19:12:00.000-07:00

This weekend promised to be glorious! 3 days long, a trip to visit my parents and siblings, BBQ with friends and gorgeous weather.

This all went out the window on Friday when Alexandra started acting funny. I could tell she wasn't feeling good. The cries weren't the normal fussy/pick-me-up-Mommy! cries, but serious achy cries. I thought she seemed constipated since she was straining but not pooping. We gave her some baby Tylenol and hoped for the best. She woke up every single hour (or less) that night. We were at my parents so I know she was in unusual surroundings but this was just god awful! I was exhausted. Saturday morning she had a fever. So, we gave her tylenol again and went to our friends for a BBQ. She seemed to cheer up and we thought she was on the mend. Unfortunately on Sunday morning she woke up and was BURNING up. She was soooo hot and sad and it was breaking my heart! We took her to Sick Kids hospital here in Toronto (amazing place!!!) and they checked her ears (fine) and then decided to check her urine...by giving her a catheter! That had to be the worst thing ever to witness. Poor little thing! Urine came back fine. So, we were left with a fever and no known cause. Went home and took it easy (she was soooo sleepy!) and Monday she seemed a bit better, but still sleepy. By nighttime her fever was back. I was starting to panic and my mind was going to terrible places thinking that she was seriously ill with some freak virus or worse..like cancer. I of course resorted to Dr. Google and that only freaked me out more. I know it had only been 3 days with a fever but to me that was a looooonnng time to have a fever for no known reason! Well, today she finally seemed better. No fever. Still a bit sleepy but hopefully on the mend! phew! oh...and to make this weekend even more crappy....my husband punched me in the face on Friday night! Now before you get crazy thinking i'm a battered wife, here's the story: Hubs was trying to cheer up sick Alexandra by doing a funny "dance" that involved flailing of the arms. I happened to approach as he flung his fist out to the right...and right into my eye. I am now sporting my first "shiner"! We definitely were a sad pair all weekend:

Here's to a happy and healthy week ahead!

LTB

6 months

2011-06-16T19:05:00.001-07:00

Time flies when you are having fun!

Just a quick post to document my baby turning 6 months old! I don't have the energy for a long or interesting post (despite many issues on my mind that I want to discuss with my blog-buds!) since one thing 6 months seems to have brought is sleep troubles.... :(
Alexadra turned 6 months old on Sunday! Holy cow! How did my little new born suddenly become closer to a year than to a fetus in my belly! How did my once tiny 5.5 pound baby become a totally normal sized chubby 15 pound baby! She is so much more interested in toys and fun stuff (like mommy's cell phone and the tv remotes) than ever. Here she is hard at work at her "desk":

She now sits totally unassisted! She did this for the first time on her 6 month birthday and now is a pro! I'm so proud of my little girl and it is soooo cute!

She also found her feet in the past week or so and thinks it is so fun to play with them. She is still not interested in rolling over in either direction. She has done both directions but will not do it consistently. She is pigging out on organic brown rice cereal but is not interested in pureed carrots, peas or sweet potatoes and for some reason she will only eat when my husband feeds her. From me she just closes her lips tight and turns her head away! She knows I've got the good stuff!

She is the love of my life.

Happy half-birthday baby girl!

Simply Irresistable!

2011-06-06T11:09:00.000-07:00

Yippee! I got an award! Thank you Carla for giving me the Simply Irresitable Award!

So here are the rules

* Thank the giver: Thank you Carla!! I think you're sweet too!
* List 7 things about me:
1) I have 3 tattoos. One on my lower back, it's big and if I could see it I would definitely regret it. One on my foot, its a pieces symbol and I like it and one on my hip, its an infinity symbol that the hubs and I got when we got married.
2) I am currently doing my Masters in math by online courses. It's tough to find time with the baby! Thank goodness for the new 2 hour naps she has started taking in the mornings!
3) I have been napping for two hours in the mornings. Ooopss... I'm supposed to be working on that Masters course!
4) I love California. I wish I lived in California. I even wanted to call my daughter "Callie" because it reminds me of the happiest most beautiful place on earth. Perfect weather. Beaches. Mountains. Heaven.
5) I want to have 4 kids. I love big families.
6) My dream job is to be a talk show host. Like Oprah or Barbara Walters. I would love to be on the view. I picture myself being like Elisabeth Hasselbeck (minus the strong political opinions). I actually voted "most likely to be a talk show host" at my highschool graduation!
7)In highschool I was also voted "Inseparable buddies" with 3 other girls. We were a fierce foursome! Now, I only talk to one of them. Sad but true :(

My little one is waking up now so I can't think of 15 people to pass this on to! But if you are reading, then of course I think you are sweet! So this award's for you!

LTB

Not Invited!

2011-06-01T19:56:00.001-07:00

We are having a crisis in my family right now. My little brother is getting married in September. I am a bridesmaid and was also asked to be the MC at the wedding. I was totally looking forward to it and my plan was to bring Alexandra to the wedding and reception and then leave around 7 to take her home and put her to bed and then have a babysitter there so I could go back to the wedding for the nighttime party. She will be 8 months old at that time. Since I'm the MC I emailed my bro and his fiance to tell them that I would be gone from about 7 to maybe 8:30 to put the baby to bed so they might want to ask someone else to either be the MC or to step in for me while I'm out. Well, last night my brother called me to tell me they didn't want Alexandra to come to the wedding at all. Not the ceremony. Not the pictures. Not the reception. They want me to get a babysitter for my breastfeeding baby for the entire day/night. Ummmm....NO!

I can't believe my brother is being such an asshole! Actually I think it's for sure the fiance but my bro is obviously on her side. So, basically I said I don't want to be in their wedding and he told me that was my choice and I could wait until August to make the final decision! WTF!
I told him to screw off and hung up!

Am I crazy or is it totally psycho that my baby is not invited to my brother's wedding?

Tell me she wouldn't make the cutest flowergirl????

The Most Wonderful Sound in the World

2011-05-25T20:09:00.000-07:00

Baby Laughing....Melt My Heart!

Ignore my ugliness and terrible voice. Focus on the child. Precious, cute, sweet little child!

Alexandra Laughing

So What Wednesday

2011-05-18T10:27:00.000-07:00

So what if:

It has been raining here steady for 2 weeks. And thus...I have been a sloth. No power walks with the stroller and I'm feeling gross!

Its 1:30, I have a pediatrician appt at 1:45 (atleast a 15 minute drive away) and Alexandra is still napping. I can't bear to wake her! Oops...guess we'll be late!

I bought a cookie yesterday for $1.25. I paid with a loonie (dollar coin) and a quarter. The cashier gave me a toonie (2 dollar coin) back as change. Hmmmm.... I love stupid cashiers! Yes, I kept the money. Every toonie counts when you are on mat leave!

I made a tray of rice krispie squares 2 days ago, my husband hates them, and it is 90% gone. Wasn't me!!!

My baby girl got me out of a speeding ticket! I was going 58 km/hour in a 50 km/hour area (for those US folk that's 36 mph in a 31 mph area), and got pulled over. Shit. Baby is crying. She is in a major "hate-the-car" phase. Start talking to the cop, digging for my license and registration and she starts going nuts. He looks at me and says..."Go. Your baby saved you this time!" Woo hoo! Crying baby saves the day! And yes, I know I should not be speeding with a baby in the car (but seriously...5 miles/hour too fast...?)

That's it that's all! Time to wake the sleeping babe and head to the doc...hoping i'm not about to wake a dragon!!

Travelling with Baby

2011-05-16T10:04:00.000-07:00

We took our first family vacation this month. We flew to Florida and stayed in a condo for a week. I thought I would write a post about some of the trials and tribulations of travelling with a baby.

Sleeping arrangements:

We rented a studio type condo with only a sliding divider (not noise proof) between the bedroom and the main living/kitchen area. This was probably the most stressful part of the trip. We felt very restricted after Alexandra went to sleep. It was so scary to move or talk in the condo since we didn't dare want to wake her! Luckily the weather was wonderful so we spent the evenings on the balcony. I would recommend trying to get a place with a real bedroom (or a hotel room that is a suite with a separate sleeping area).

I am super paranoid about sleep. So I took precautions before we left to ensure that Alexandra's sleep environment would be as close as possible to the same as at home while we were away.

I brought garbage bags and duct tape. Why you ask? To cover the windows since in my experience I have found that condos/hotels we rent don't often have great black out blinds and with Alexandra going to bed at 7pm, it is definitely not dark in Florida at that time. These worked out great and the room was dark.

We decided to bring Alexandra's travel crib (the one she was sleeping in in our room until we moved her to her big real crib). It folds up but is in no way light or small. We didn't want to pay the airline to bring the awkward item so my husband bought a giant luggage and we stuffed it in there. He didn't need much space for his stuff anyways ;) It was just easy to bring on the airplane this way. But definitely a pain in the butt that we had to do this. Next time we go somewhere we will ask/request a crib so we don't have to bring ours.

We also brought our white noise machine. No way was I leaving that thing behind!

In fact, I brought her noise machine and her swaddle in my carry on...i wasn't risking losing those in the luggage!

We also made good use of the bath tub. For her naps, that's where she slept! We swaddled her up, laid a thick blanket in the tub and in she went. She slept great in there and since the bathroom had a door we were free to make noise and do our thing in the main living area.

Traveling with so much stuff: The airlines were actually better than I anticipated. We got to bring our carseat and check it for free. We could bring our stroller right to the gate and check it there for free. And Alexandra got a luggage (on the Canadian airline we used...not true for US airlines where you have to pay for any checked bags!). I also got to bring on my carry-on, my purse and her diaper bag.

We were nervous about bringing our Uppababy stroller for fear of the airline ruining it in travel so we bought a $150 umbrella stroller to bring. In hindsight, not necessary since we could bring the strollers right to the gate they weren't getting tossed around with the other luggage. I think we would have been fine to bring our real stroller, and that would have been handy because the carseat can go on our Uppa but not the umbrella stroller.

Definitely, we had way too much luggage and it was a mega pain until we checked the bags and car seat. Not only did we have more bags/stuff but we also had a baby! Give yourself extra time to get organized and navigate your way through the airports with all this stuff!
-stroller, car seat, luggage

Sun: Stay out of it. Duh! We also bought a UV shield (like a net) to go over the stroller, it is breathable and blocks 100% of UV rays so you can take baby out in it. We didn't use this because Alexandra didn't co-operate and hated the umbrella stroller we had bought.

We also bought her a sun/swim suit that is like a wetsuit and a hat with a big front rim and a hangy thing at the back to cover her neck. This was great and allowed us to take her out for a swim without worrying about the sun. Also kept her warmer in the pool. I will use it for the indoor swim lessons I am going to do with her next month.

"They" say not to use sunscreen on infants under 6 months but we used it on her feet and arms when we went out just to be extra careful.

Naps: Slow down..and let them happen. I am such a go go person that I was hoping A would just nap on the go or at the beach or whatever. Not so much. We had to respect her nap schedule and go back to the condo for her first 2 naps of the day. Otherwise it was a shit-show! Crabby baby alert! We tried to get her to take her 3rd nap on the go, which was sometimes successful and sometimes not. I know other babies may be more flexible and go with the flow type babies, mine is not. She is a mess if she doesn't get her naps and then everything just sucks. She also doesn't just "fall asleep" when she gets tired. I have to swaddle her up and put her down.

Airplane: No problems . Except maybe being "those annoying people with the baby". I suggest nursing on the up and down. Alexandra slept most of the way.

Schedule: As I said above, don't plan to do too much. Everything just takes longer with a baby. And a baby's attention span is short (atleast mine is!) So she most likely won't want to go on a full day of outlet shopping...even if it is for stuff for her! Try to just enjoy being in the moment and do one thing a day.

Eat early/Eat late? This was one problem we had. Since A goes to bed around 7 and I have to nurse her before bed (she won't take a bottle and I am also a control freak and don't trust anyone else to swaddle her correctly....ya, i've got issues!) so even though my parents were there to give us a hand we had to be there at 7pm to put her down. So we could either go out to eat at 5pm and leave her with my parents and then get her at 7pm and then my parents would go out to eat. Or we could let my parents go eat early and then we could go after she was asleep.

Once the baby's asleep, unless you have help you are hostage to your condo/hotel. This made for a very different vacation than we are used to since exploring the night life used to be so fun! We spent most of our evening relaxing on the balcony.

I also have to say that Alexandra's sleeping sucked while we were away. She was in our room and woke up ALOT at night. I didn't let her cry or do any sleep training stuff while we were away. It was not worth it. I feared we'd have to start from scratch with sleep when we got back but we came back and she adapted right back to her big crib, in her own room and with much less night waking. Phew!

All in all...vacation was great, but different!

I miss my tan...but I loved watching A explore new things!

Happy Vacationing!

Some pics from our trip

2011-05-13T16:51:00.000-07:00

First airplane ride! Very excited!

Looking pretty in my new sundress!

Let's go to the beach already mommy!

Close up!

Lookin' cool in my shades!

So What Wednesday (or Thurs or Fri...whatever)

2011-05-13T13:02:00.000-07:00

So what if...

It's Friday. I tried to post twice Wednesday but apparently I don't know how to post videos because it kept making and error. And apparently the photos from my Rebel camera are too big to upload to Blogger. And then yesterday...blogger sucked out. Hmph....

I have taken a two hour nap with Alexandra everyday this week, and last week! I'm so proud of my little bugger who now takes naps in her crib! With no complaining!

I went to Florida for a week and have ZERO tan. Pre-baby I was a sun goddess. I always pre-tanned (in a tanning bed) for vacations and then soaked up the sun so that I would come back with a glorious dark tan. Well, post-baby...no time for tanning beds. And the sun is definitely not a good place for a baby. So, we spent plenty of time in the shade.. And shopping of course!

I enjoy shopping for my baby MUCH more than shopping for myself! My husband and baby did way more shopping in Florida than I did. Although I did come back with four new pairs of shoes! Woo hoo for the outlets! I have to say that there is way more selection and much better deals to be had in the States than in Canada!

I can't believe my little one is 5 months old today! She is getting so big and so much cuter every day! I am so so so in love with that little munchkin!

I picked and basically ordered my own mothers day gift. It's a blue topaz eternity band. Blue topaz is A's birth stone and I plan to get another one to stack with this one for each child I am blessed to have. And, if I never get another ring...this one is beautiful on it's own!

This post is turning into more of an update and getting long so I will sign off now and come back with an update on sleep training and traveling with a little one!

The Plan

2011-04-22T08:20:00.000-07:00

In order to lift my spirits and in particular get my hubby on board with helping more I decided to make a plan. My husband isn't really the jerk I make him out to be. He is an amazing guy, hard working, super sensitive and madly in love with me and my daughter. He is however a bit oblivious. I honestly think he doesn't know how to help. And how can I really blame him since until I made "the plan" I didn't even know how I wanted him to help. So, I made a plan and approached him about it and his is ON BOARD! So, after this weekend, here's hoping that I get some more support at home.

The plan:

1. Instead of coming home from work and eating the dinner I prepared while I hold the fussy baby (yes...I started doing this and then I will eat after...my fault...he never asked for this but he did say he is too hungry when he comes home to do anything except eat immediately), he will have a snack before coming home and when he gets home it will be his time (about 45 minutes) with the baby. I will cook dinner and we can eat after she goes to bed.

2. Instead of me going in the big bath tub with Alexandra every night, he will bathe her in the baby tub and read her a story and call me up to nurse her before bed. Then he puts her in the crib and is "on duty" until 11pm. If she cries he has to do the checking/shushing.

3. He normally goes to the gym every morning at 6:30 am and gets to work at about 8:15am. Instead of doing this I have asked him to take 2 mornings a week and get up with us at around 7am when Alexandra wakes up. Even if he is just laying beside me in the bed while I nurse her I think it will be a great bonding time for us as a family. On those days he can go to the gym after she goes to bed if he still wants to go.

4. Saturday is MY day. I'm going to get my hair done, coming home to feed her, going to get a pedicure, coming home to feed her and then going to the mall. After all that the three of us are going to go to dinner together (early...to accommodate Alexandra's 6:30/7 bed time). So, this will be his first extended stretch of time being alone with the baby. Maybe after this he will appreciate all that I do much more! And I will be "beautiful" (this mama is in DESPERATE need of highlights and a cut!) and refreshed.

I am feeling relieved to have talked to him about it and proud that i didn't attack him with "you are a selfish asshole..." and instead made a plan and he was totally responsive and happy and loved the plan.

So, today is a GOOD FRIDAY indeed! Happy Easter weekend everyone!!!

LTB

Feeling Down.

2011-04-21T09:23:00.000-07:00

I am feeling blah. Bored. Lonely. Overtired. Sad.

I totally love my baby...but she is hard. She is pretty fussy and high needs. Which means that I am holding her and rocking her and basically spend my days trying to get her to sleep. She will never just "go to sleep" when she is tired. It always requires much effort from me. She screams in the car so going places has become quite a headache (literally!) She is still waking up twice at night to eat which I don't know is normal or not given that she's 4.5 months old.

It doesn't help that I get zero help from anyone. My family is far away and my husband doesn't help. Granted he works a lot, but he is also pretty selfish and doesn't stay do much when he is home. I am also a bit of a control freak and don't know if I really want him to help since I want things done my way. It's a double edged sword.

I have completely lost myself. I don't go work out because Alexandra is too fussy to go to the daycare at the gym during the day (maybe I should give her some credit and give it a try but if she fusses there like she does at home they will need to hold her the whole time). And in the evening I need to be around for her bed time so the only time I could go to the gym is after around 8pm which is when I am exhausted and not going to go. Especially since I want to be asleep by 10, it doesn't leave me much time and I don't want to get all sweaty and awake right before bed time.

I haven't gone out with girlfriends (not that I have many) since she was born (not counting mom-friends with babies in tow).

I haven't enjoyed any alone time with my husband and I actually resent him a ton half the time so I don't even want to spend time with him alone. Great. Our marriage is sucking.

I am so paranoid about her "sleep schedule " that I don't enjoy family gatherings adn I'm paranoid about our upcoming trip to Florida. I wish I could just "go with the flow" and have some fun. I'm so freakin' uptight its disgusting.

I'm starting to get nervous about baby #2. First I'm nervous that I won't get pregnant..when is is safe to go back to the RE? Do I have to quit breastfeeding first? I'm no spring chicken at 32 so I know my clock is a tickin! But I'm also nervous about being able to handle #2 if he/she comes out as fussy as Alexandra! Two super fussheads under 2 would be quite daunting!

Well...my little princess just opened her eyes smiling at me and suddenly this post seems pathetic. So, I will sign off. Sorry for the rant. Sometimes it's tough being a mom!

LTB

Ten on Tuesday

2011-04-12T06:09:00.001-07:00

I saw this on Seriously's blog and thought I'd give it a go! You can link up on Chelsea's blog!

Ten on Tuesday

1. If you work, do you drive to work or take public transportation?

I currently work at home (a much tougher job than my former teaching job!) but when I was working I ride my bike 90% of the time. I even rode until 2 weeks before my due date! However, I haven't been on my bike since A was born.

2. How often do you get your haircut? Do you go to the same person every time?

I get it cut very rarely. I should make time to take better care of my hair but I hate spending the money and I hate spending a whole afternoon at the salon getting highlights and cut. I usually get it cut maybe twice a year (eek!) and get the highlights done maybe 3-4 times a year! I could use highlights probably 5 times a year but I suffer with gross roots for a month before I cave and make an appointment

3. Do you read the newspaper? If so, a hardcopy or the online version?

I used to read the paper (hardcopy) every day (pre-baby). Now, not so much. But I LOVE reading the paper and should subscribe to delivery and get back in the habit.

4. What is the best book you have read this year?

The Help. However, it is probably the only book I have read this year!

5. What is the best movie you have seen this year?

The Fighter.

6. Do you tend to crave sweet or salty foods?

Definitely both. I have too many vices! But more sweet than salty for "treats" since I usually just add a ton of salt to whatever I'm eating!

7. Do you eat breakfast every day? If so, what do you have?

Oh ya! And as I have said before...I eat the exact same breakfast EVERYDAY. English muffin with peanut butter, an orange and coffee!

8. If you celebrate Easter, what Easter treat/candy are you most looking forward to?

I don't "celebrate" Easter per se...but I love those Cadbury Cream Eggs!

9. How late is “sleeping in” to you?
I LOVE LOVE LOVE to sleep in. I used to sleep in until 10 or 11 on weekends. Post baby...not so much. We get up at 7am. A sleep in now is when she sleeps until 8 (rarely if ever!)

10. Where are you going on your next vacation?
We head to Florida on April 30th! We rented a condo on the beach in Fort Myers. Hopefully the weather's good!

Have a happy Tuesday girls!

LTB

Sleep Training Con't...

2011-04-11T09:44:00.000-07:00

We have kept up with the sleep routine of just putting her down and then checking her at increasingly long intervals for the past 5 days now. First day we had 28 minutes of crying, second day we had about 4 minutes! Third day about 8 minutes, Fourth about 15 and last night about 20 minutes. Soooooo....she's still crying to get to sleep, but she is going to sleep and not waking up as often in the night. And when she does wake up , she will whine for a couple minutes and then go back to sleep, unless its time to eat of course.

We are definitely going to keep going with this and hopefully she will stop crying all together at bed time soon ( it is dreadfully painful to listen to even 5 minutes of crying!!!) .

Next steps/questions/advice....

Alexandra is 4 months old, she still wakes up twice to eat at night. She goes down at 7pm, is up around 12:30 to eat and then again around 4am, and up for the day around 7am.

Question 1: is this normal? too much? some books say she should only need one feeding in a 12 hour sleep stretch. Should I "wean" her from these night feeds or do babies naturally wean themselves? I would absolutely LOVE to only get up to feed her once at night!!! How can you tell when your baby is waking up due to hunger or habit?

Question 2: to anyone who has done sleep training and is still feeding at night....what do you do if your baby is "supposed" to eat at 4am but wakes up at 3 or 3:30? Do you let him/her cry and go check on her occasionally until the eating time or do you just feed her at that time and then hope she doesn't wake up again? or if she wakes up again then do the crying/checking thing then?

Question 3: Anyone do a dream feed? I'm afraid to disrupt her sleep cycles by picking her up to feed her before I go to bed at 10pm. I'm scared she'll wake up or won't wake up but won't eat at all. Is it worth it to try? Since she's 4 months...have I missed the window to try this? Any tips? Success or failure stories with the dream feed? (aside: she won't take a bottle so I would have to pick her up and breast feed her).

And Next Step: Operation Baby-Outta-Ma -Room!!!!

She sleeps in her own travel crib beside my bed but I am so over tiptoeing into bed and not watching my beloved Kardashians before I sleep! We are installing black out drapes in her nursery and when that is ready she's outta here! (I know it will be bitter sweet and I will likely cry....)

Aside: We are going to Florida in a couple weeks and we got Alexandra a cute little sunsuit and swim hat to protect her from the sun! I think she looks adorable!!!

Sleep Training Day 2

2011-04-08T18:34:00.000-07:00

Thursday night went great! We put Alexandra down at 7pm. The plan was to wait 5 minutes and go soothe her without picking her up, then wait 7 minutes and then go in every 10 minutes. Well, we didn't have to go in even once! She fell asleep after 2 minutes of whimpering!

At about 10pm she woke up and we were in bed by then. Hubs and I hid under the covers and were really quiet (she is still in our room sleeping in the travel crib). She fussed for maybe 3 minutes and fell back asleep. She woke up at 1:40 am to eat, then at 4:30 to eat and then at 6:30 she started to cry. I wasn't going to let her cry it out at 6:30 when we usually get up around 7:15 so we just started out day then! Even though she is still getting up twice to eat (she is still only 4 months old) this is a major improvement from waking up every hour! For this morning's nap, she went down without crying AT ALL!

I'm so proud of my little girl!!! Here's hoping Day 3 goes even better!!! And also hoping that i'm not jinxing myself by telling everyone how great she's doing!!!

And today is also a super special day....One year ago I got the amazing life changing call...I was pregnant! I love my little miracle baby and can't believe it has been a year since she's been with us-(even though 9 of those months were in my belly!)

See you tomorrow ladies!

Sleep Training Day 1

2011-04-07T06:49:00.000-07:00

First off I want to start by asking people who are "anti-sleep training" (and anti-crying) to please be nice and not leave me mean comments. I'm having a rough time as it is!

So, after having the WORST NIGHT EVER on Tuesday we decided to start sleep training Alexandra on Wednesday night. On Tuesday she woke up every 45 minutes from 11:15 until 7am! I was going insane! Each wake up required either eating, picking up and rocking/bouncing. It was HELL!

So, last night we did our usual bedtime routine of a bath, story, feeding, swaddling and then my husband laid her in her crib awake. I usually would rub her tummy and put the stupid soother in her mouth until she fell asleep. But last night NO SOOTHER and he left the room.

She cried.

He went in after 3 minutes. Kissed her, rubbed her tummy and said "nighty night". She was still crying.

He waited 5 minutes. Then repeated the above.

Still crying.

He waited 10 minutes. Repeat above.

Crying was slowing but persisting.

He waited 10 more minutes and before going in she stopped crying! And FELL ASLEEP!

It took 28 minutes and she was asleep WITHOUT THE SOOTHER!

I was "on-duty" for the night time shift since hubs has to go to work and so he set up the pull out couch in case he needed to go there.

She slept until 12:30. I fed her. And put her back down awake. She fussed for about 7 minutes. Then fell asleep.

She woke up at 3:30. Not yet time to eat (she eats normally at 4:30). I let her cry. Hubs went to the couch. After 3 min of crying I rubbed her and kissed her. Then repeated after 5 minutes, 10 minutes, 15 minutes and repeated at 15 minute intervals. Unfortunately, she cried until 4:20 when I fed her. Then I put her down and she fell right to sleep and slept until 7:30.

All in all I am calling night one of sleep training a success. I am so proud of my baby and I am loving her and kissing her and hugging her extra today to make up for the sucky crying we had to endure! I think she had a better sleep last night than she has in weeks, and so did I.

Nap time today was also a success! I put her in the crib awake, no soother and she fell asleep with mild fussing after 12 minutes! She slept for 40 minutes which is standard for her. (we will work on nap length eventually!).

So, day 1 down. We survived. I am loving my little princess like crazy and hoping that tonight is not a shit show!

Wish us luck and check back for day 2 tomorrow!!!

LTB

zzzzzzz.........

2011-04-05T14:43:00.000-07:00

The first 2 months of A's life I was tired. But going on adrenaline and dealing with it just fine. In the next month I got tired. Really tired. Then in the past month her sleep habits have gotten worse and now I am hurting BIG TIME. I am so exhausted I feel like my head could fall off. I'm soo tired that I'm irritated by everything. i'm sooo tired that I can't sleep well when I have the chance too. Alexandra is now sleeping with approximately this schedule:
Bed 7pm
12:30am wake to eat
2:30 am wake, require rocking back to sleep for about half an hour
4:30am wake to eat
5:30am soother falls out...
6:30am soother falls out...
7:15am up for the day.

I usually get to bed around 10 but have been having trouble falling asleep before 11. This means the longest stretch of sleep i'm getting is 2 hours! This hurts!

I hate to complain because I know I would hate to hear someone lucky enough to have a baby complain about anything. I feel guilty complaining. But I am at the end of my rope here.

Sleep training....this weekend we are starting. She will be 4 months old and something's got to give.

Any advice on what worked/didn't work...?

Oh...and sleep when the baby sleeps (ie. during naps) does not happen over here! She only naps "independently" in her crib for about a half an hour...not enough time for me to even get to sleep. Otherwise we are napping in the stroller or in my arms...

Any tips on how to make her naps in the crib longer would be appreciated too!!

She's torturing me with lack of sleep but she sure is cute!!!

See for yourself!

So What Wednesday

2011-03-30T18:34:00.001-07:00

So what if...

I now read in bed with a headlamp under the covers....baby has hijacked the bedroom!

I was soooooo sad when my latest book came to an end (The Help)! I hate ending a great book and I hate starting books. But once I'm into them I love them! I just got Sarah's Key to start reading...anyone read it? Reviews?

I have decided tomorrow is a "stay home and rest and let baby nap on me all day" kind of day. Even though it is supposed to be nice weather, I think we both need a day to chill out. I have gotten myself completely obsessed and wound up about naps and sleep habits that I think I have stressed us both out. So tomorrow we are going to nap every hour and a half for however long (Alexandra tends to only want to nap for 40 minutes...one of the causes of my stress/concern!) and just play and watch movies in between.

I have not taken ANY naps since Alexandra has been born. Zero. When she naps...I can't sleep! I can never sleep if I'm holding her and if she is down then I am always doing something else that "needs to be done". I think I took more naps (and was much less tired) before she was born.

I haven't been to the gym in 3 weeks. I was on a roll going 3x a week for a few weeks, then I got stressed b/c my hubby couldn't handle a crabby baby at night and we moved her bedtime earlier and blah blah blah. And now I just don't care anymore. The gym's not going anywhere so I'll get back at it eventually.

I have become one of those annoying lonely people that talk to cashiers way too much. Hey...the only other conversation I have from 6:30 am to 6:30 pm is of the ga-ga goo-goo variety!

Link up at Mama Dew's!!!

Accomplishments!

2011-03-29T07:58:00.000-07:00

So in my recent obsession about sleep habits I have realized that I am not instilling good habits in alexandra by rocking her until she is fast asleep and then putting her down. I have heard its best to put babies down drowsy so they learn to fall asleep on their own and don't freak out if they fall asleep in your arms only to wake up in their crib. I have been way too tired and lazy to even try putting her down at night without rocking her into dreamland, so u decided to give it a try at nap time. So yesterday I swaddled her up, got her drowsy and put her in her crib and stayed there rubbing her tummy until she fell asleep. I was convinced she would nit be able to do it but she did! She only slept for half an hour but hey...its a start! Last night at her 7pm bedtime i was tired from a long day (and my husband had not yet come home from work!) so I decided to rock her to sleep as usual but then 5 min after i layed her down she cried. s I went up and did not pick her up. She was staring up at me but stopped crying. I rubbed her tummy for about 20 minutes and she fell asleep! Woo hoo! another unintentional accomplishment! I know this is just a start but its a step in the right direction! Ultimate goal... put baby in crib drowsy and leave the room and she falls asleep! ha ha! that seems so impossible but we will see. so today I am prooud of my baby! She did great!!!

So What Wednesday

2011-03-23T09:11:00.000-07:00

So what if...

I really want to do sleep training...but I'm too lazy right now.

I turn up the music loud when A is crying/screaming in the car. And I open my window. Gotta do what we gotta do to get home safe!

I never want to take A to sleep anywhere other than home again....her sleep gets totally f'd up no matter where we go!

I go to Indigo and read books and drink coffee but buy nothing. Just need to get out of the house sometimes!

I was on a good roll with going to the gym 3x a week...but I've lost my fire. I just don't care right now. I'm tired. I'm lazy.

I'm burned out doing my masters course...I got my husband to do 2 of the questions for me on my most recent assignment (he has a phd in math so my masters stuff is easy for him!)

I'm really really tired. But too lazy/tired to do sleep training....wtf....

I'm totally disgusted that we got 5-10 cm of snow today! Nice.

I love when people tell me my daughter looks like a mini-me....I'm glad she looks way more like me than my husband!

Thats it for now! I'm tired so I'm going to go stare at the TV while bouncing little A on my hip!

LTB

So What Wednesday

2011-03-16T07:40:00.000-07:00

so what if....

my baby has never napped in her crib...until today! I honestly never tried getting her to nap in her crib so today I did it and she fell asleep in there for 45 minutes! Unfortunately, I fell asleep about 30 minutes after her, so I only got a 15 minute nap...oh well!

I just realized I am still using Christmas themed hand towels in my bathroom (yes I've changed them but I keep putting back clean Christmas ones!)

I took one gravol pill to help me sleep, and I think it helped my baby sleep...and I liked it. However, I will do the responsible thing and not take it again until I'm not bf'ing. Guess she's gotta learn to sleep with out sleep aids...

I put a lot of the clothes people have bought Alexandra away in the "too small bag" not because they are too small but because I don't think they are cute.

I'm obsessed with Mommy-groups. I love the one I'm in. And I signed up for another one. And I would sign up for a third if I could find one! I don't know what it is but I love the conversation, the forced friendships, the common bond of our babies and no pressure to hang out after the group or call my "mom friends" on the phone. we just reliably meet up every week at the same place and talk about our babies. So fun! (Boy oh boy...my idea of fun has changed!!!)

What are you saying SO WHAT to?

Randoms...

2011-03-15T08:46:00.000-07:00

Alexandra went 8 days with no poop...then Sunday this week she pooped 3 huge ones in one day. Always keeping me on my toes!

When do babies start rolling from tummy to back? I am seeing some babies in the blog world who are doing it as young as 2 months...not Alexandra. She doesn't love tummy time but she doesn't hate it enough to roll over. When does this normally happen? Are we behind? Or are there just some baby geniuses out there?

Alexandra was sick for the first time on Sunday and it broke my heart. She woke up with a fever and then she threw up all over me and was crying and clingy and sad all day. I just cuddled her all day and she got over it by Monday. thank. the. Lord! It was scary and heart wrenching to watch her be so miserable.

Needless to say we had a bad sleep on Monday night. She slept like a rock from 8:30 until 1am, but I was so worried about her I kept checking her breathing and couldn't wait for her to wake up to eat to make sure she would eat and that she didn't have a temperature. Then she slept from 1am until 4 and that was pretty much the end of sleep for the night. I think it must have been since she basically slept ALL day sunday when she was sick.

Last night we were back to the "usual" sleep routine. 7:30-1am, eat, 1am-4am, eat, 4am -7am, wake up. I can handle that. Last week we had the wake up every hour thing going on. I am not into that AT ALL! Praying it was a phase she is OVER!

Alexandra weighed 11 pounds at her 3 month appointment this week. She has doubled her birth weight! I cannot believe it! And its all my milk....soooo cool.

Well, I'm off to my mommy group but I will post again tomorrow for So What Wednesday!!!

Regression....

2011-03-11T11:12:00.000-08:00

Sleep Regression.

Alexandra was never an amazing sleeper but for the past 6 weeks or so she has been sleeping from 8pm until about 1 or 2, then eats, sleeps again until 4 or 5, eats and then is up between 7 and 8am. Well, for the past 2 nights she has been up every hour past 11pm. She doesn't wake up crying exactly, just fussing, kicking her legs in her swaddle and struggling. It would definitely escalate to crying if I didn't step in. I usually put in her soother (I have a love/hate relationship with that damn thing!) and cross my fingers. She will doze off for another half hour to an hour and then the fussing starts up again and I go and put the soother back in etc, etc, etc. All . night. long.
Needless to say she has been super cranky all day these past couple days, as have I.

Is this the "4 month sleep regression" I have heard about? Although she is only 3 months?

I am starting to freak out because I am having a hard time dealing with the sleep deprivation and then trying to deal with a crying/fussy baby all day!

Will this go away on its own? Anything I can do?

Help moms! help!

She sure is lucky she's cute!

LTB

So What Wednesday

2011-03-08T08:38:00.000-08:00

So what if...

I eat the same breakfast every. single. day. Peanut butter on english muffin, a big juicy orange and coffee.

My worst fear is that Alexandra will have a peanut allergy! (ok...not the worst fear, but a biggie!)

I am turning 32 tomorrow...and hate the thought of my eggs maturing...already fretting over ttc#2. I want to TTC again soon, but want to give A by 100% attention, and energy and want to keep nursing so we will likely not try until she is almost a year old. I want to be fair to her, even though I can just smell my eggs rotting!

My afternoons have sucked for the past three weekdays since Oprah has had her stupid camping with her friend episodes on....seen them, and they are boring.

My baby is a Bugger and pooped in her car seat just as we were heading to the pediatrician because she wouldnt poop!!! Hey, atleast we got poop! And we have had 3 more poops since then so hopefully her 1 week poop-hiatus will not repeat itself!

What are you saying So What too?

Link up at Life After I Dew!

Poop....help! Advice Needed!

2011-02-28T06:54:00.000-08:00

Hello ladies,
I am getting worried. My little one has not had a poop in 6 days! She is only breastfed so I have heard they can't be constipated. Normally she goes every one or two days! Has anyone experienced this lack of poopiness or know what the problem might be or what I should do? I am going to the pediatrician on Wednesday but if I can't get any advice before then I would be happy!
Thank lovelies!
LTB

My Favorite Things...

2011-02-27T07:18:00.000-08:00

Some other mommies have been doing posts about some of their favorite baby things so I thought I would do the same.

The first item I am going to talk about I just got on Friday but so far it has transformed my life! I may have mentioned that Alexandra has been crying ALOT. All day, unless you are holding her standing up and bouncing or strollering or driving. Needless to say, my arm has gotten exhausted, I have gotten nothing done, and I have been so tired and stressed to see my baby so sad. Well, on Friday I went an bought a swing. I put little A in the swing and she is in heaven! She loves the mobile that goes around and the swinging is so soothing for her! she is happy to be in there when she is totally awake, this never happens in our vibrating chair. After a few minutes in the swing, if she is tired she passes out and will nap for a while. I have eaten breakfast and lunch the past two days in PEACE! She is in heaven and i am in heaven!!! I am being very vigilant not to 'abuse' the swing. I don't want her to become sick of it (ahhh....the horror of going back to my life just a few days ago!) and I don't want to be neglectful at all by being the parent that just tosses their child in a swing and walks away. But to be honest, after she's been in there for a half an hour i am dying to hold her and cuddle her and play with her so there is no fear that I will neglect her in the swing! The swing we got is the Fisher Price Rain Forest Swing. It plugs in to the wall or runs on batteries. It is pretty big and we avoided getting it earlier b/c we
a) didn't want to clutter our condo and
b) didn't know how FREAKIN' AMAZING it was!

Go and get the swing. NOW!

Item number two we also didn't get until 4 weeks ago and it has also transformed my life! I used to co-sleep with A in our bed. Cuddled up to me. Not the safest option. and not the best option for me to get any sleep at all. She is loud, and flails and squirms. So upon recommendation from some ladies in my mommy-group I got the Miracle Blanket and used it on A and put her in her bassinet beside the bed. I swear, without the Miracle Blanket, everytime I tried to put her down in the bassinet she would cry. This thing keeps her cuddled all night long and helps her sleep longer stretches. I highly recommend it to everyone. At first I thought she hated being swaddled. This thing is seriously like a baby straight jacket and you have to pull it TIGHT! The first time I tried it she went insane, crying , screaming...I gave up. Tried it the next night and persisted and after a few minutes she settled right down. Now, she doesn't even fuss when I swaddle her up in it! Last night little A slept from 8:30pm to 3am ! What a miracle! It is also really easy to use (comes with instructions...that are super easy to follow) and it is nearly impossible for them to break out of! A couple of times she has gotten a bit loose but can never get her arms out. Apparently it helps with baby gas too by putting pressure on the abdomen. Get the Miracle Blanket NOW!!!

The third thing that I avoided getting because I didn't think we would need it but has since made my life so much easier is the carseat-stroller adapter. I have the UppaBaby Vista Stroller and the Graco Snugride 35 carseat. I thought I would be fine to just have the stroller and wouldn't ever really need to take the car seat out of the car and put it on the stroller. But let me tell you, the last thing you want to be doing is waking up a sleeping baby from a carseat to put her in a stroller. Baaaadddd idea. Now with the adapter I just take the car seat out and plop it on the stroller base and go. Alexandra never wakes up and we go out, do errands and get back home without a fuss. Best $70 we ever spent.

One other thing I really like but have not "transformed my life!" is the Diaper Genie. Its easy and great to keep stink out.

Oh...and the last thing that we got for baby was the SUV. Best purchase ever! We need the space sooooo bad! When we visit family we have to go overnight so we pack our bags, her bags, stroller, bassinet, bouncy chair, stroller...would not be possible with just a car. SUV Rocks!

Some stuff we have bought that I don't use much right now or really care about are the baby tub (she bathes with me), the vibrating chair (she doesn't like it, and now that we have the swing, it is rendered useless!), and the MammaKangaroo carrier (I know tons of babies love these wraps and slings but she hates it and it hurts my back).

So, that's my list folks! And I leave you with some cuteness!

My little princess (a.k.a. Bug, Buggy, Bugaboo, Alexandra) is 11 weeks old already!

How Dare I....

2011-02-23T13:56:00.000-08:00

How dare I complain about crying and tiredness when this family is suffering an unimaginable pain. I feel so sad for them and so sorry for my complaining. Sometimes I need a slap in the face to remember how grateful and lucky I am. Alexandra is wearing a bow for Maddie. We are sending love and prayers to the family.
LTB

So What Wednesday

2011-02-23T08:19:00.000-08:00

So What If....

I'm super jealous that Shannon got to have a night (SLEEEEEPPP!) to herself this weekend! I am TIRED! PAINFULLY TIRED! Alexandra is crying ALOT during the day and in my tired state I am going INSANE.

I wished for a few minutes this morning that I had to go back to work. It was a hell of a lot easier than dealing with a crying baby all day.

I cut my 10 week old baby's nails for the first time today. I was too scared! But after she scratched her nose I realized it was time!

I watch the View, Oprah and Young and the Restless pretty religiously these days. That's more TV in one day than I used to watch in a week!

I officially hate my in-laws. Like, wouldn't care if I never ever saw them again. They are so difficult and always full of drama that I can't handle anymore! (remember...I'm TIRED!!!)

I pretty much only blog on So What Wednesdays...I suck. I'm tired. My baby is crying. What can I say! I am reading though!

What are you saying So What to? Link up here!

Mommy Love

2011-02-18T08:41:00.000-08:00


Recently we have been noticing something in our household. Baby girl is growing very
 attached to her mommy. Now I think this is very flattering and I love it,but it does
have a down side. Baby girl cries inconsolably with daddy, if I step in and take her...
Calm and happy baby. I pass her back to daddy so he can hold her in the exact way I
am
...screaming baby. Has anyone else experienced this with a two month old? I feel bad
for my husband, but I also feel mad that he doesn't have more patience to deal with
the crying before passing her off to me. It sucks because hubs doesn't get much time
 to spend with her and hen when he does she wails! :(
I have been telling hubs to hold her more when she is happy instead of putting her
in her chair or swing when she is happy. He really only holds her when she is crying
and otherwise thinks she doesn't need to be held. I in the other hand love to hold
her happy and sad. I can hold a baby, blog, work on my assignfments for my masters
course, ear, cook, pee...hubs is a one thing at a time guy(I think most men are!)
so he feels if he is holding her he can't do anything else and so he wants to put
her down even to check his email. I love that my baby loves me, but I don't wan her
to only be dependent on me for comfort!

Any advice?

On a positive note our bed time is going great! She goes down after about 15
minutes of rocking and walking at 815 and let night she slept until 2, fed, right
bac k to sleep until 5 to eat, back to sleep until almost 8! It was great! Normally
she stirs around 6 and is fidgety until I get her up at 7, so I loves the peaceful
mornig slumber (although I did keep waking up to check if she was still alive!)
ah...the wordy never ends for a momma!

So What Wednesday

2011-02-16T08:39:00.000-08:00

So what if...

...I still log-in to my work email atleast once a day, even though I'm on maternity leave.

...my name is Lisa but pronounced Leeza...but I rarely correct people until we become good friends. It's just not worth it. Don't do this to your children...give them normal names, or atleast ones that are pronounced the way they are spelled!

...I am not sure if I still love the name I chose for my daughter. But I love her so I guess that's what really counts.

...I told my husband the cleaning costs $80, she really costs $60. I pocket the extra $20. It was an honest mistake the first time, I just never corrected it...and now its like a little treat for me!

...I'm 9.5 weeks post partum and have only done ONE workout. I will be trying to go tonight for my second!

Hope you all have a great Wednesday! What are you saying "So What" to? Link up at Shannon's site!

LTB

So What Wednesday...

2011-02-07T09:03:00.000-08:00

I sometimes pretend the baby was up more at night than she really was just to get pity from my hubs. In my defense...I get no help from him with the babe so I deserve a little pity!

I only bathe my little one when I am in the tub with her. Its hard for me to shower so this is the perfect way for us both to clean up together!

I don't want to have sex. I got the ok from the doc this week and am dreading the weekend when I know hubs will be ready to go. am i totally weird for feeling this way? will it go away?

I compare my baby's "cuteness" to all of my friends babies...of course she is the CUTEST.

Doctor Oz and I have become good friends. I often find myself quoting Oz-isms to my hubby at night after work.

haven't even done a minute of exercise in 2 months. But in my defense.. I just had my post-partum check up yesterday (delayed due to scheduling conflicts). Pregnancy weight is gonzo but I'm definitely skinny-fat and sooofffttt right now!

I eat peanut butter and crackers IN bed at night...gotta stop. At first the excuse was I was breast feeding and thus starving. then I was just bored as I sat in bed cradling her until she fell asleep, well now that she is sleeping very quickly in her bassinet...I have no excuse and I am just gross.

Join the fun and link up on Shannon's site!

You are getting sleeeeeppppyyyy....

2011-02-03T09:07:00.000-08:00

Sleep is always a popular topic with new moms. Obviously we enter motherhood knowing we will be sleep deprived. Now, for me at the beginning (maybe first week or 2) I did not feel tired. I know I was EXHAUSTED but I was running on pure adrenaline and hormones. As the weeks went on, the tiredness, and accompanying BITCHINESS came into full effect. I was mean. I was sooooo tired. I dreaded the nights, I knew I would be lying awake, watching the baby, soothing the baby, feeding the baby while my husband snored next to me with his earplugs in.

Now, here's where I have to make a confession. I was sleeping with my baby in my bed. Cuddled right next to me. I never planned on being a co-sleeper. We had bought a travel crib to go beside our bed and that was where I envisioned the baby sleeping. In fact, I was definitely one of those women who thought people who co-slept were "stupid" and making bad parenting decisons. Well, the first night in the hospital the baby slept in her hospital bassinet...like a baby! Then the second night...she cried. and cried. and cried. and all that soothed her was to sleep in the bed with me. And so began our co-sleeping.

We came home and I continued to bring the baby to bed with me and cradle her until she fell asleep and then lay her down beside me to sleep. I would wake up a zillion times a night because my baby is a GRUNTER and it is LOUD! I also wasn't swaddling her so she was flailing around like crazy. I would wake up to her noises, her movements and if it wasn't one of those two reasons, I would wake up because my arm would be completely numb since I was sleeping on it and too scared to change positions in order to not wake the baby.

Now, even though I was not sleeping well, I was convinced that putting the baby in the crib would be worse because she would NOT sleep. I envisioned putting her in only to encounter a massive crying, screaming fit! Afterall, my baby NEEDED me! I would rather have woken up to a numb arm or a few grunts than upset her and have to repeatedly get up to soothe her crying. I also have to admit that I LOVED the smell, the feel, the closeness of having her right next to me all night long. Afterall, she was right beside (ok...inside!) me for 40 weeks! It was tough to imagine her not connected to me!

Well, last week I decided to try out the bassinet. I bought a swaddle that was recommended to me by a lady at my mom-group. It's called the Miracle Blanket. And let me say...it is just that! Alexandra loves to flail her arms around and easily busts out of many swaddles we already have. Those velcro ones have no chance! So, I swaddled her up TIGHT. Really tight is the key. I felt bad doing it, its like putting your baby in a straight jacket! Of course she screamed. and I figured she would be unswaddled and in my bed in no time. But after a few minutes of shhhing and rocking she was out cold. I put her in the crib, and she slept. For FOUR hours. and I slept for FOUR hours! When she woke up, i didn't unswaddle her ( I was warned not to unswaddle her!) and I fed her and she was back in the crib and asleep 30 minutes after waking. and so was I. She slept for another 3 hours after that! holy smokes! I woke up refreshed! a new woman! and we have not looked back since! Quitting co-sleeping has changed my life! I don't dread the night time, i can actually "put her to bed", it gives me a tiny bit of freedom that i didn't recognize i needed! I know there willl still be rough nights but man oh man am i happy i tried something that i was so afraid of! i'm really proud of us!
LTB

So What Wednesday

2011-02-02T08:40:00.000-08:00

I have come across a very funny series on the blog Life After I "Dew". I am going to participate in So What Wednesdays! Woo hoo!

So what if...

I am obsessed with my baby's poo. Need to look at it every time...even if hubs is doing the change.

I sometimes hide dust/crumbs under the fridge.

I cried when my baby went to size 1 diapers this week.

I slept with my baby IN my bed for 7 weeks.

I like to eat the chocolate chips out of cookies, and toss the cookie part. Its just not the same to eat plain chocolate chips from a bag.

I think Ricky Martin is super hot..too bad he's gay...and i'm married...

I hate to close the bathroom door, even in public washrooms...i'm a freak. and i will close it if there are other people in there.

I cry everytime we leave my parent's house.

That's it for now! but I will have to start recording my "confessions" for next week!

Have a great Wednesday. It is a snow day here in Toronto which means me and baby A are stuck in the house.

Time to back cookies (so I can eat the chips out of them....just kidding! I will eat all of my homemade cookies!)

LTB

Birth Story

2011-02-01T08:27:00.000-08:00

Finally, after 7 weeks, I want to record little Alexandra's birth story. It's not that exciting (well...it was super exciting for me!) but I want to record it for myself.

My due date was Sunday Dec 12th. However, I was feeling fantastic and not "ready" to be done being pregnant. I thought when I was ready to give birth I would be so uncomfortable and ready to get that baby out! That was definitely not the case. I loved being pregnant. So, I worked until Friday December 10th. Then on Saturday the 11th I finished my final paper for my master's course. I submitted the paper at 10:30 pm on Saturday. Then, hubs and I decided to watch the movie Taken (good movie...I recommend). At around 11:30, I felt a gush. My water broke! I ran upstairs (leaving a wet trail behind me!) and grabbed a pad (good thing we had purchased the giant "Depends" pads...they were a MUST HAVE!) We didn't know what to do and were mildly freaking out. I wasn't having any contractions so we didn't know if we should go to the hospital. So I did what I always do when I need help..called my mom. She told me to call the hospital and ask...duh...I couldn't have thought of that on my own?! When we called L&D they asked about the colour of my water. It was not clear. It was more brown/green. They said that meant there was meconium in there so the baby might be in distress so we had to go in right away. We packed our bags (since I thought I was going to be WAY late we were exactly all packed and ready to go!). We drove the 5 minutes to the hospital and as we were walking in to the hospital at around 12:15am I had my first uncomfortable contraction. By the time I was checked in and hooked up to the monitors I was having some serious contractions. By 1am they were coming every 4 minutes and were super super strong. I was hurting. And, those stinkin' external monitors were so tight I couldn't breathe! ugh! I asked for an epidural around 1:30 but to my dismay (actually...to my absolute horror!) the anestisiologist was in emerg dealing with a car accident case. Ummm...hello! this is a giant hospital in a giant town and there is ONE stinkin' anethetist???! I started freaking out as we waited for him to come. These contractions were making my whole body quiver and shake. I was in agony. I don't wish labour pains on my worst enemy! I was squirming a lot so they had to take off the external monitor and put on an internal monitor on the baby's head. I was not pleased that they had to do this (she came out with a sad little scab on the top of her head..:( ). Oh well. When I finally got the epidural we waited an he pumped me up with a test dose. I was still feeling pain. LOTS. He pumped more meds in. Still pain. Major, worsening pain. He finally said that clearly this epidural didn't work because he had given me enough meds for a big man. This led to more MAJOR freaking out from me! Oh my god. I cannot do this without the epidural! So, he agreed to try to put it in again in a different spot. And thank the lord...it worked. I could breathe and relax. ahhhh......

Totally weird sensation though to have your legs completely paralyzed! My parents had driven in (1.5hours) after we called them so they arrived and were allowed to come and see me once the epidural was done. It was great to see them. So, at this point it was about 3:30am and they told us to take a nap. With all of the beeping and monitors and just pure excitement/anxiety there was no way I could sleep. Hubs on the other hand through in his ear plugs and passed out solid. hmmm...obviously that was a sign of things to come!

Nurse came to check me at 5am and said it was GO time! I was already fully dilated! OMG! This was all happening so fast! I thought I would be labouring for HOURS! We woke up hubs and prepped the room for pushing. She paged the doc (who I still hadn't met yet...) and we started pushing around 5:15am. Once the doc arrived we did 3 big pushes and an unfortunate episiotomy because her heart rate was dropping on the pushes. Out she came at 5:33am! Perfect. Beautiful. Amazing. As soon as she was out I started puking...EVERYWHERE! I overflowed 2 pails and it was all over me and my bed. Luckily it was just watery but it was still so gross. But hey, in the heat of the moment I didn't care and I wanted to see my baby. They cleaned her up, weighed her (5 pounds 8 ounces) and brought her right to me. I was IN LOVE. My life was forever changed. My baby girl was with me. Forever.

Immediately after the birth I was comfortable. That dang epidural worked so well! Thank god!
Unfortunately, it wears off. And I was hurting. BAD. I had lots of stitches and was passing blood clots the size of TENNIS BALLS! Totally gross and scary. I also kept puking everytime I stood up for about 24 hours. Those first trips to the bathroom were traumatizing and agonizing. I passed out the first time I walked. Scary.

Breastfeeding was easy and amazing right from the first moment she was at my breast. I know I am sooooo lucky for this.

The BEST thing for after treatment I got was the frozen maxi-pads to put in MY diaper. These were amazing an d helped the pain and inflammation sooooo much. I couldn't walk normally for atleast a week. Sitting was painful. The worst thing I did was LOOK at "it". Oh my goodness...that was scary and disturbing. I don't really recommend looking at that patch-work that is the post-birth-vagina! Ahhh!

So, that's it. My baby girl had perfect timing and arrived right on her due date, right when I was done work and my course and she came FAST and furious. Thank you baby girl!

Now 7 weeks later, I am walking normal, feeling better, and beginning to contemplate going back to the gym. But really, until this week, I was still feeling weird pain/pressure "down there" and it got way worse when I walked too much, so the gym was not even on my mind. But this week I feel much better.

I have my official post-partum check up in one week. We'll see how the doc thinks things look..cause lord knows I am not looking down there again until I know it is all clear!

I'm heading out now to my New Mommies Class but I have a post to write about sleep that I am resolving to write today or tomorrow! I am doing great reading blogs and keeping up with everyone else but having a hard time finding the time to post myself! I will get better. I love reading everyone else's updates and get disappointed when my bloggie friends don't post so I should definitely be posting more (obviously I'm assuming atleast someone wants to read my blog! ha ha! ).

I leave you with a few pics:

The night my Iphone saved me...

2011-01-20T14:22:00.000-08:00

Yesterday was a bad day. Lots of crying. From baby and mommy. So strange how one day she is awake and pleasant and amazing and the next she lets her inner demon out and cries and screams all day. Well, I hate these times during the day, but I am absolutely terrified of these crying times at night! So last night my new iphone saved me. I downloaded a miracle app. It's a white noise app, and i just played it to Alexandra's ear when she couldn't settle down at 4am and she went silent. And slept. I even found the noise relaxing and I think it put me to sleep too! The app has choices to play white noise, airplane, fan, waves crashing, rain storm, chimes, and a train! It has quickly become my favorite app of all time!
Today baby A is much happier and I am as well!
That's all I've got for today but I will post some recent pics and some updates (including a post on sleeping arrangements...touchy subject!) soon!
love you guys!
LTB

One Month

2011-01-12T19:36:00.000-08:00

I can't believe my little tiny baby is one month old already! This month has flown by! Too fast! So much has happened with the holidays and gettign used to having a new baby! I am falling more in love with her every day. She is growing so much! I can't believe that my once 5.5 pound baby is now a whopping 8 pounds! She is growing like crazy! I guess milk does a body good! We had an appt with our new pediatrician yesterday and he confirmed what I already know...she's perfect! I loved the doctor, he is older but super nice, and patient and great with the baby. We go back in a month for her shots...we'll see how that goes!

Alexandra's getting a lot stronger now, she can turn her head from one side to the other when lying on her tummy. And she is lifting her head and holding it up on her own a lot more now. I'm still waiting for that first smile, but I can tell that she is seeing me now and hearing my voice for sure. She loves when we read to her or tell her stories...even if i am reading her articles about colic! ha ha!

I will soon have to do a post about some stuff I'm wondering...like sleep habits. But for now, I just wanted to post to mark my sweet baby's first month of life. Happy one-month birthday baby girl! I LOVE you sweet pea!

What nicknames do any of you with babies have for them? We call Alexandra "bugaboo", "peanut", "baby girl" and "princess". I wonder if any of these will stick to adulthood. I think its really cute when dad's have nicknames for their daughters...especially when they mention them at their weddings! ok...I'm getting sad even thinking about that! Getting ahead of myself!

Night-night!

LTB

New Mommy Story

2011-01-07T08:29:00.000-08:00

I had a very funny thing happen the other day that made me feel like a "real new mom". I was about to feed Alexandra so I completely stripped off my shirt. Then she decided to have a poop, so I got up (still topless) to change her diaper in the kitchen. As I am changing her, she starts wailing, and in response to her cries both of my ta-tas start POURING milk all over the floor. Then my puppy Cosmo comes running over and drinking my milk off the floor! I was standing there, topless, dripping milk, wailing baby, and Cosmo loving it all! Woah... what have I become!?

Things have definitely improved since my last post. Baby A must have just had a bad day (I hope I'm not jinxing it by writing this down!) because she has been great the past week. She cries but is pretty easy to console. We took a few outings this week, went to Indigo to buy the Happiest Baby on The Block book (thanks Egg for the recommendation!) and have a coffee, we went to a coffee shop to meet a friend and we did groceries. i am starting to settle into this new mom thing. But I do have one guilty confession and am wondering what other people do/think. Alexandra is being great and going back to sleep after our 6 or 7am feeding and letting me sleep another 3 hours. So I am sleeping until 9 or 10am. I feel guilty for this. Do you think I should be getting up and going at 7am or is it ok to sleep? For both her and me?

One other guilty admission I have to make. Something I NEVER thought I would say or even think:

I am currently hating my dog. I want to cry just writing that. But seriously, I have NO patience for him! His annoys me beyond belief. I feel bad for him because I know it has been a big change for him too , but his shitting on the floor and jumping on the table and getting in my way ALL of the time is not helping his cause if he wants me to love him! I am seriously hoping that as things settle down I start to love him again, but right now, I honestly wish I had someone I could give him to for a couple months . I hope no one is too offended by this, I know I probably would think I was a total bitch if I had read someone writing this before I found myself in this situation. I guess its easy to judge until you live it.

Anyways, here is a pic of my cutie-pie in her "big girl" uggs!

Hope you all have a great weekend!

LTB

Pictures and a few words

2011-01-02T20:36:00.000-08:00

hello everyone! Happy new year! I had a wonderful relaxing new year's eve with the family, baby Alexandra was delightful. Then we came home last night....and the crying HAS.NOT.STOPPED! She definitely has gas. She is squirmy and crying so much today and I feel so bad for her (and for me!) Not being able to "fix" everything for your child has to be the worst and most exhausting feeling. I am hoping that today is just a bad day. I am praying that colic is not setting in. I feel sad because she didn't cry very much all weekend at my parent's house and now at home its like she hates being here! I hope she loves me and doesn't wish she lived with her grandparents! (I know she loves me...but clearly she thinks crying is the best way to show it...??!$$##&*1!)

Anyways, I am currently enjoying a few minutes of peace and must go stare at/worship my beautiful non-crying daughter while I can! Wish me luck tonight!

Here are a few pics from the past 3 weeks (baby A is 3 weeks old today! Growing up so fast!)...

AFTER A BATH

THE THINKER!

GOOD MORNING!!!

FIRST FAMILY XMAS

THE DAY SHE WAS BORN, FIRST FAMILY PIC

GOODNIGHT!

Hello Stranger!

2010-12-28T08:25:00.001-08:00

I have dropped off the face of the earth. Apparently blogging with a new born and Christmas is proving too much for me! I'm reading though (mostly while breastfeeding!) And I miss you guys!

So....Alexandra is 15 days old now. I love her more than I thought possible to love ANYONE! My fears of not loving her like every other mother describes evaporated the instant I heard her first cry and kissed her cheek. She is a precious, beautiful angel and my heart melts when I look at her.

I was VERY emotional for the first week (ok...i'm still really emotional) after she was born. I cried EVERYDAY. But they were tears of overwhelming love. Seriously, I was so overwhelmed with emotion and the only way I knew to deal was to cry! And of course, i have already started crying about her growing up too fast! I haven't been feeling sad or depressed at all which was another one of my fears so that is good. But that being said, it has been a super busy time with lots of visitors and fun times. Reality will set in come January when everyone is back to work adn its just me and A at home alone.

We have already been out a bunch of times. Walks to the coffee shop, grocery store, and even to a friend's birthday party when she was 5 days old. She does great in the stroller, car seat and loved the party (ie. she slept the entire time! )

The one thing I'm struggling with is a bit of resentment of the hubs. He sleeps 8 hours straight everynight. I sleep in 2 hour stretches. I am exhausted and I sometimes want to kill him when my alarm goes off to feed her at 3am and I look over to see him snoring like a bear. ..... errrr.
He is off work now until next week so part of me is pissed that he gets to sleep and he doesn't even have to get up for work. But really, there is no point in him getting up since i'm the one with the boobs. Speaking of boobs...woah...I've got BOOBS! And lots of milk, like running down my stomach and soaking through 2 shirts! crazy!

Also, had a few battles with hubs over his soccer games, parties for work, and his "need" to workout . All of these make me pissed since I'm at home, in pain (episiotomy...OUCH!) , and not allowed to work out or do anything for 6 weeks. I don't want to leave my baby girl either and i just don't get how he can even want to do all of those things rather than spend every free second with Alexandra. I think a mother's love is deeper than the fathers right at the beginning. But I see him getting more attached and being "better" with her everyday. His love is growing.

Anyways, little A is beckoning so I must got and whip out a boob for her! I will post the birth story and more photos later!

Miss you all and hope you are having a great holiday!
LTB

Littlest Princess

2010-12-13T20:51:00.000-08:00

She's here!!!

2010-12-12T15:09:00.000-08:00

At 1130 last night my water broke. By midnight contractions started and STRONG and 4 min apart. By 5 am, 10cm and time to push . 15 min of pushing And there was princess Alexandra! Perfect tiny little girl! 5 pounds 8 ounces! Will update more details with pics soon! Right now I'm exhausted but I mmommyheaven!!!!

The Wall

2010-12-09T10:24:00.000-08:00

I've hit it. Mentally and physically I have hit the wall. I am hardly sleeping, running on pure adrenaline and just powering through my last week of work and the countdown to my dday (which is on Sunday!)

I am totally checked out of work, but at the same time trying to care enough to train my replacement. My students are keeping me happy becuase they are being super sweet and sad about me leaving! :) In hind sight I wish I had taken a week off before my due date. Although, I'm pretty positive I will be stuck waiting for atleast an extra week past my due date!

I have my final paper for my masters course due on Saturday at midnight. I'm also scrambling to get that done, with limited focus and motivation!

Christmas shopping...trying to get it ALL DONE! If this baby arrives I'm sure the last place I will want to be is in a mall right before xmas! I think i'm almost 100% done now.

Workouts...I quit this week. I was doing sooooooo well my entire pregnancy and keeping up pretty good workouts. Then on Saturday I even did a Body Pump class and walked 6 km home and felt great. Took Sunday off, then Monday (after only 4 hours of anxiety ridden sleep) I decided to just take it easy and not force myself to work out this week. First it was a plan to rest until Wednesday then get back into it until the baby comes. Well, that didn't happen (Christmas shopping did instead!!!) and now I feel lazy and gross and disappointed in myself but at the same time I think I need to listen to my body and rest before the baby makes its arrival. I hate that I have this exercise addictive personality that fills me with so much guilt! ugh! I suck at cutting myself any slack. So, I may be done with the gym until 6weeks (or longer) post-baby. Kind of freeing and relieving to say that. I'll just enjoy the nightly walks with the pups and the hubs.
One other reason I'm thinking its best to lay off the workouts is that I have been gettting a ton of painful contractions where my tummy gets rock hard, mis-shapen and crushes my lungs. I seriously have to breathe through these things! And I have noticed they get bad when I move alot (exercise) or lift heavy stuff. So, as much as I want labour to come, I want to avoid painful "false labour" contractions!!!

I just feel like I have hit a wall and I can't think about any one thing at a time because I have too much to think about!

And I'm tired. Really tired.

I hope that the baby waits until maybe Tuesday or Wednesday so I can get some rest this weekend! But then I again...I hope she doesn't wait too long!!!

Also, my friend from work who was due the same day as me had her baby yesterday. I'm jealous. And my infertile brain reared its ugly head and I felt a stab to my heart. Her baby was healthy and perfect, and I got a sudden sinking feeling in my gut that something will still go wrong with mine and I will be left alone in the infertile hole again! It really never ends I guess.

Anyways, thanks for listening to my rant! Clearly, I have lots to do and shouldn't be wasting time on the internet! But I love you guys too much, and I need a place to vent!

Have a happy Thursday!

LTB

39 weeks

2010-12-06T06:34:00.000-08:00

How Far Along? 39 weeks....6 days till due date. I'm due on Sunday! OMFG!

Maternity Clothes? Everything is just majorly uncomfortable since about Friday now. My belly is really tight and hard and irritated by anything touching it.

Stretch Marks? No. I beat this nasty beast!

Sleep: Too many pee breaks are making me tired! Woke up this morning at 4:30am...couldn't fall back asleep. Finally got up at 6 and walked the dog, in the snowy yucky weather. He was not pleased, but I was bored and had to do something productive!

Best Moment of the Week? I can't think of anything super wonderful that happened this week! Sad I know!

Movement? Less. Painful jabs and tummy tightening.

Food Cravings? nope

Gender? GIRL

What I miss? My stomach not being in pain. It keeps tightening and it actually takes my breath away. Feels like my lungs are tightening up. Not sure if these are Braxton Hicks contractions or real contractions or something totally different. But they hurt.

What I'm looking forward to? Mat leave starts in 4 days! And birth of the baby! eek!

Weekly Wisdom: D-day seems so far away and then it creeps right up on you! I'm so scared!

Milestones: ?

Emotions: I'm scared. I'm scared of change. I'm scared of my life changing and having no "me" time. I'm scared I won't want to be around my baby 100% of the time like all of the other moms I read about! What if I can't handle being a mom! What if I don't get that amazing love feeling all new moms talk about? I feel so guilty admitting this but it's true.

Hope you all have a great week. And wish me luck making it through my last week of work (hoping this babe doesn't decide to come out early...I must work the rest of the week!)

LTB

38.5 week belly pics

2010-12-02T06:56:00.000-08:00

I am getting a bit sentimental that these are going to be one of the last belly pics I take! Crazy!

We are noticing the shape of the belly looks more 'down', hangin' low!

Side view (ignore the messy room floor!)

Another one of the super low belly!

Hope you all have a good weekend!

LTB

38 weeks

2010-12-01T06:18:00.001-08:00

How Far Along? 38 weeks and 3 days! I guess this kid is coming any time now (or super late...which is what I'm expecting!)

Maternity Clothes? The usual. Work pants and jeans are maternity, otherwise no way.

Stretch Marks? No. I beat this nasty beast!

Sleep: Too many pee breaks are making me tired!

Best Moment of the Week? Got my first internal exam. Did not hurt. I was nervous it was going to KILL but it was no big deal at all! Apparently my cervix is short and I'm a fingertip dilated (whatever that means?!) Doc said this is good, but I could also stay this way for weeks.

And we installed the car seat! So now I drive a baby-mobile!

Movement? Less. And it freaks me out sometimes. Doc said she is just outta room. I've been using the doppler again though when I get nervous! Or just poking her so she gives me a little wiggle!

Food Cravings? Smoked meat sandwiches....weird!

Gender? GIRL

What I miss? Nothing! I feel great and I'm just excited to get my baby in my arms!

What I'm looking forward to? Only one more Monday left until maternity leave begins! woo hoo! I'm looking forward to being done work (and hopefully having a baby in my arms within days of finishing!)

Weekly Wisdom: Pregnant and shopping in ridiculously busy malls is a PAIN! People are so rude and pushy and I hate shopping! Might do the rest of my Christmas shopping online!

Milestones: We are in my baby's "birth month" now!

Emotions: Today I'm feel really calm and cool. I'm not feeling like I'm ready to give birth, I don't feel "pregnant" enough or exhausted enough yet! I feel like I might be pregnant forever! ha ha! I'm just trying to go with the flow and not get too anxious or excited any time soon!

So, that's me at 38 weeks. Next week is a boring doctor appt (no internal check or anything) and then the following week when I'll be 40 weeks and 2 days we will "sweep my membranes" to help labour along.

I'll post some pics when hubs and I take some tonight! But basically, I look the same as last week. I think belly growth is maxing out!

LTB

Full Term (37 weeks)!

2010-11-24T10:39:00.001-08:00

How Far Along? 37 weeks and 3 days! We are officially full term. It's baby time any time now!

Maternity Clothes? The usual. Work pants and jeans are maternity, otherwise no way.

Stretch Marks? No. Hoping I avoided those!

Sleep: My anxiety is getting the best of me I think. I'm really having trouble falling back asleep when I wake up to pee. My mind starts racing and my heart is beating really fast and I can't stop thinking about stuff I need to do, my fears, labour etc. I am definitely feeling like I'm running on adrenaline!

Best Moment of the Week? Lots this week!
Doing our prenatal classes!
Reaching full term status!
Work baby shower!

Movement? Tons. It wakes me up, takes my breath away and looks super creepy! Gotta get a video of it soon!

Food Cravings? Nothing new.

Gender? GIRL

What I miss? I kind of miss feeling relaxed but i'm also just super excited!

What I'm looking forward to?My internal exam at my appointment next week. Want to see if i'm dilated at all! I doubt it though. I feel like i'm going to be late...:(
Also excited to go Christmas shopping this weekend! Gotta get most of its done before the little one arrives!

Weekly Wisdom: ?

Milestones: Full Term!

Emotions: Nervous. I'm nervous about so many things. I'm scared firstly about labour, I'm scared about having a baby and losing my freedom, i'm scared about being late and "ruining" christmas by being in the hospital (I know that one is kind of lame but its sort of true! I'm hoping to have the baby and bring her to my parents for the festivities!), i'm nervous about being alone with the baby and being bored, I'm scared i'm going to get PPD. I'm scared something will be wrong with our daughter. I'm scared of breastfeeding/failing at breastfeeding. Oh and I'm super scared about recovering from a vaginal birth....ouch!!! Sooooo many unknowns! I'm also nervous about my relationship with hubs. Will we fight? be too tired to "love" eachother? be supportive of eachother? I'm sure these are all normal fears of new moms but they feel really overwhelming right now!

One other thing...I lost 2 pounds at my appt... wtf? Is this normal at the end of pregnancy? I thought I was supposed to be packing it on big time at the end? I'm not eating more, I can't! I have no room! But I'm not really eating less either. I just hope she's growing. I'm starting to think I'm too small now. Actually, sometimes I feel HUGE and some times I feel too small. It is crazy what these hormones can do to a girl!

Here are a bunch of pics from events of the past few weeks!

Cutest homemade cake ever! My SIL made it for my shower! She even made the booties!

Me and one of my preggo girlfriends! She is 5 months along.

Baby UGGS!

Ugly side view at 37 weeks (right before bed so ignore the gross looking face and clothes!)

Front view at 37 weeks.

I wished you all a happy Thanksgiving last week by mistake so again I'm saying Happy Turkey day to all my US-bloggies! I'm certainly very jealous (of the holiday and the food!)

LTB

36 weeks

2010-11-16T06:06:00.000-08:00

How Far Along? 36 weeks and 2 days! OMG, we have 5 days (yes...DAYS!) until full term and 3.5 weeks until due date!

Maternity Clothes? The usual. Work pants and jeans are maternity, otherwise no way.

Stretch Marks? No. Still hoping to avoid those!

Sleep? WOW. Just realized that my problem with sleep may have been (for the past 2 YEARS!) that our bedroom was toooooo bright! We got new curtains in our bedroom to make it DARK and I have been sleeping like a baby (except for the 2 pee breaks in the night.) since Saturday. I love darkness. We are going to get blackout curtains for the baby's room too...darkness really really helps with sleeping for me so maybe it will help keep our daughter asleep too? maybe just wishful thinking but we'll give it a try!

Best Moment of the Week? My maternity photo session on Sunday! It was so fun and the pictures turned out great! We did them at the lady's studio in her house. I did some alone, some with Cosmo, some with hubs and Cosmo, some with just hubs. We did a few outfits, most were belly baring...and we did a few topless and a few full on nudies! eek! The nude ones are very tasteful and only side views. She sent us a link with all of our photos but you can't save any of them so I have none to post right now but when we go back for our baby shoot we will get a cd with all of the photos so i'll post then! I love them!

Another great moment was that we got the mattress for the crib so I got to put the bedding on it and it looks so cute!

Movement? Little girl is getting her feet (or something) lodged in between my ribs and it hurts! Also my belly is always contorting in weird ways and I love it!

Food Cravings? Nothing new.

Gender? GIRL

What I miss? I'm not missing a thing. Just super excited!

What I'm looking forward to?Appointment today (and then weekly appts from now on!!!) and our pre-natal classes this weekend! We should have done these a while ago so i'm relieved that we are finally going to get our butts in gear and learn something!

Weekly Wisdom: ?

Milestones: Photos done!

Emotions: All over the freakin' place! mostly anxiety and excitement! But I'm still really moody and can totally snap from being super nice to super bitchy in a matter of minutes (usually I revert back to super nice again quickly thank goodness!)

Anyways, I hope you all have a wonderful week! I think my American friends have a long weekend coming up! Jealous! Enjoy the turkey fest!

LTB

35 weeks!!!!!

2010-11-09T06:47:00.000-08:00

How Far Along? 35 weeks! OMG, we have 2 weeks until full term and 5 weeks until due date!

Maternity Clothes? The usual. Work pants and jeans are maternity, otherwise no way.

Stretch Marks? No. Still hoping to avoid those!

Sleep? I'm really anxious. I'm waking up a lot thinking about all of the stuff we need to do/get before baby! I wake up with my heart pumping and feeling like I need to clean the baseboards in the baby's room....at 4:30 in the morning! I guess this is nesting??

Best Moment of the Week? My shower on Saturday! It was so great to go home and get spoiled by my family and friends! I got lots of cute baby clothes...its actually ridiculus how much stuff is out there for girls! And we got lots of stuff we need too, like the monitor and the tub and the changing pad and the car seat and lots more! It was a lot of fun and I love my family so much for throwing me the great shower! And my sister in law made the most amazing cake...I don't have a pic of it now but when I get one I will upload it asap! It looks professional and amazing!!!

Movement? Sharp stabs out my sides sometimes hurting and catch me off guard. Lots of night time movement and hiccups still! The hiccups are actually very distracting and irritating! But I'll take it!

Food Cravings? Nothing new.

Gender? GIRL

What I miss? Nothing now at all. I'm at a place where i'm so freakin' excited to meet my daughter (wow...i'm going to have a daughter!!! SOON!!!)

What I'm looking forward to?My maternity photo session this weekend! And then our pre-natal classes next weekend- although i'm starting to panic and wish we did those much sooner!

Weekly Wisdom: 40 weeks seems like a really long ways away when you find out you are preggers...then suddenly its HERE! Time flies! (but at the same time there have been times when it drags and drags...especially in the scary first trimester!)

Milestones: Actually had a baby shower! It's real!

Emotions: All over the freakin' place! mostly anxiety and excitement!

Here are some pics from the last week:

Me and the hubs at my shower:

Ignore the gross clothes and ugly hair!

Frontal view!

Hope you all have a good week!

LTB

34 weeks-Updated with photos

2010-11-02T08:32:00.000-07:00

How Far Along? 34 weeks!

Maternity Clothes? Nothing new. Husband "suggested" I get a couple new t-shirts as most of mine give a little tummy peep show! eek!

Stretch Marks? No. Still hoping to avoid those!

Sleep? Sleep is actually going great this week (well..now that the bed-bug thing is officially OVER!) I was freaking exhausted and miserable until Saturday but since then I have slept like a baby (wait...not sure if that means I am sleeping well or not! ) I wake up a lot but when I am asleep, its pretty solid. I actually called in sick to work today since I wanted a day to myself to sleep in, get my flu shot, and work on my project for my master's course. We have Parent - Teacher interviews on Thursday night until 9pm so I think I need to rest up for that and I deserve a break!

Best Moment of the Week? Sister and SIL seeing some wonky belly movements on Saturday at our Halloween party (that was super fun too!) and getting our crib, dresser and glider delivered (now we just have to set it up...ugh...can't things just come pre-assembled!)

Movement? A lot of hiccups, and jabbing out my side. My babe stretches out her feet and sometimes they get lodged in a not-so-comfy place in my ribs! But I love it!

Food Cravings? Chinese food craving was big all week, so we ordered it for our halloween party and it was Yummy! However, this was not a pregnancy craving...just a craving for chinese food (hubs had it too!)

Gender? GIRL

What I miss? Not being so emotional. I cry MOST days! I can't control my anger, irritability, and stress sometimes! I am actually starting to get scared shitless about the impending birth of my baby girl! I don't know how to be a mom! I feel guilty that at this moment my excitement is about equal as my fear! Sometimes, I have to admit that I even think "oh shit...what have I gotten myself into?" I guess you are never really ready! But when I get these feelings I remind myself how grateful I should be by asking myself "how would you feel if you were NOT pregnant now!" and when I think of that I know I would be sooooooo sad and frustrated and I know that I am in a WAY better place!

What I'm looking forward to? My shower this Saturday! But I do have one shower ettiquette thing I want to say: why don't people buy off the registry? Why do they think they "know better" ? Do I really need 500 onesies that are all "super cute" ? No.... I need my baby monitor, my nursing pillow, the bottles and soothers that are ON MY REGISTRY! Duh!

It's just frustrating to see that only 3 things are bought off my registry and I know that was by my mom and sisters. I know I shouldn't be picky and should be grateful (which I am!) but come on people...we told you where to buy my gifts...it actually makes your life easier to just pick something off the registry!!! Oh well.

Weekly Wisdom: Third trimester hormones make you an emotional nightmare!

Milestones: We can now say we are due "next month"!

Emotions: see above. All over the freakin' place!

I have some pics from Halloween that I will post later (I left my camera at work)! They are pretty funny!

Hope you all have a good week!

LTB

Updated: Here are some Halloween pics!

Me and my kind of gross/weird costume...it was baby arms and legs sticking out of the stomach and the one hand is holding a trick or treat bag with a chocolate bar in it. Kind of weird I know, but I was short on time and ideas!

My brother and his fiance dressed as me and Hubs in 6 months from now! Notice the pit stains my bro painted on! So funny! And that is my hubs as batman!

One more of my bro and fiance.

It was a fun night!

:)

BAD week...

2010-10-28T11:08:00.000-07:00

OMG....this week has sucked big time. Not pregnancy wise- that is going fine. Just life wise.
Hubs and I had a shitty weekend, lots of bickering and nothing "fun" for just the two of us to do (family weddings out of town don't count as "fun" anymore since we have been to a zillion!). Ok, the week is looking good on Monday, we are nice to each other and have plans to go out to dinner on Tuesday together. Then, on Monday our neighbour found a bed bug (or got bit or something). Toronto is on FREAK OUT MODE over bed bugs these days....everyone is paranoid! So, we freaked that we might have bed bugs! Tore apart our whole bed room. Got contacted by our property manager that a pest control guy would be coming in on Wednesday to inspect/treat for bed bugs. I'm relieved that someone is coming but the prep is HORRIBLE! We had to wash and dry EVERYTHING in our entire condo that can be laundered. Clothes, towels, sheets, pillows, blankets....let me tell you ...that is A LOT of stuff! We had to wash and the bag and seal it all by Wednesday morning. Stuff that can't be "washed" needed to be tossed in the dryer for 20 minutes on high heat and then bagged and sealed. Anything we didn't have time to get to had to be bagged and sealed and then immediately washed after the treatment. So, we spent all night monday and tuesday doing laundry...we have 50 huge sealed garbage bags on our kitchen table, counter and bath tub now. We only washed 30 of those bags and the rest remain to be washed. We also cleaned out our bedside tables and since my husband is hyper paranoid we through them away as well. We also through away our pillows.
So, yesterday the bed bug guy came and found NO SIGN of any bugs or eggs. But just to be safe he treated anyways. This is a big relief, but I also kind of feel like we did all this for nothing!

Another huge pain in the ass is that our pup cosmo was not allowed in the house as he treated so we had to send him to a doggie day care for the day and pregnant ladies can't sleep in the pesticide house for 24 hours. So, I had to get a hotel alone last night. Hubs had to stay with the dog, and to top it all off he had to leave for Calgary for a work trip today at 5am!

Our good week...turned to the worst/busiest/ most annoying week ever! Last night I had to scavenge through a bunch of bags to try to find something to wear to work today (to bring to the hotel with me last night).Annoying! And now today after work and the gym I will head home to tackle the 30 more bags of laundry....alone. Kill me now!

Hubs comes home on Friday night really late and then we are hosting a halloween party on saturday...should be fun but busy and at this point I wish we weren't having the party at all so we could just relax!

Anyways, that's my bitching for the day. On the bright side...thank goodness this happened now and not 7 weeks from now when the baby is here!

Cheers to no bed bugs!!!!

LTB

33 Weeks

2010-10-26T09:03:00.000-07:00

How Far Along? 33 weeks!

Maternity Clothes? Tights, boots and long shirts/sweaters. Way cooler than maternity clothes (or atleast the lame ones I find at the TWO maternity stores here...pathetic!)

Stretch Marks? No. Still hoping to avoid those! Hoping its genetic(my mom did NOT get them with all 4 kids!)

Sleep? No heartburn at night in a week and a half....Zantac is a life saver. Plus I sleep pretty much sitting up, and don't eat at night. This all sucks, but let me tell you...the heartburn sucks more!

Best Moment of the Week? Putting together our stroller! We have the Uppababy Vista and we fully assembled it on Saturday. I got a lump in my throat when I saw it all ready for baby! This is really happening...i'm excited but soooooo scared!

Movement? A ton of hiccups. Which actually get annoying and make me feel like I have hiccups! Poor little baby. I hate hiccups! Lots of rolling and jabbing me in the ribs etc.

Food Cravings? Oh Henry!!! Thank goodness there's less than a week left until all of the halloween candy stops being for sale!

Gender? GIRL

What I miss? Nothing right now!

What I'm looking forward to? Nursery furniture delivery! We had to postpone it from last Sunday (boooo....) but it is now coming on Saturday! woo hoo! I'm also excited to find a cute halloween costume for my party this week! Any ideas?

Weekly Wisdom: Pregnancy is no reason not to dance up a storm at a wedding! I had a ton of fun dancing (in heels!!!) at the wedding we went to this weekend! I just stayed out of the "mosh pit" and had so much fun. Almost forgot I was preggo!

Milestones: Started the countdown to due date in DAYS....only 47 days to go!

Emotions: Feeling pretty good. But hubs and I have been fighting a lot...I think we are both anxious and short tempered these days (not sure what his excuse is..but i'm 33 weeks pregnant!! Ha ha!)

Here are some progress pics from the past few weeks:

31 weeks (getting ready for work)

32 weeks (hope you don't mind the undies!)

33 weeks at a wedding

Wedding again...

Me and the hubs at the wedding

So that's me at week 33!

LTB

LTB

32 weeks and 3 days

2010-10-20T11:49:00.000-07:00

How Far Along? 32 Weeks and 3 days!!! Oh my!

Maternity Clothes? I hate most maternity clothes. I think it is clear I'm not going to even go there (aside from the few items I currently have). Loving the tights, boots and long sweaters look!

Stretch Marks? No. Still hoping to avoid those! Hoping its genetic(my mom did NOT get them with all 4 kids!)

Sleep? Trying Zantac again to help with the heartburn at night. Slept like a rock last night. Up once a night too pee...not too bad!

Best Moment of the Week? Buying our crib and getting our bedding in the mail!!! Crib, dresser and glider are all being delivered on Sunday! Then we can set up the nursery!

Movement? A ton.

Food Cravings? Oh Henry!!!

Gender? GIRL

What I miss? sleeping without heartburn! and I'm starting to freak about not making "my own" money when I'm on mat leave. Hubs and I don't have joint accounts. We both make good money and we both contribute to our mortgage and bills, but mostly he pays for more stuff than me (as he should since he makes triple me!) so my money is mostly just my money to do what I please with. Well, when I don't have any incoming cash flow I will need to totally depend on (and be accountable to!) my husband. I'm just not comfortable with this. I like taking care of myself! So.... I miss not being worried about money!

What I'm looking forward to? Nursery furniture delivery! And my halloween party next weekend and my shower after that!

Weekly Wisdom: nada

Milestones: 32 weeks seems like a milestone in itself!

Emotions: Feeling great right now! I'm more tired and thus more cranky...sorry hubby! but when I get exercising or get moving I always feel better and more happy. So that's another reason on my list to not be lazy and keep biking and working out.

My OB appt went really well yesterday. Gained 3 pounds in the last 3 weeks, growing well, heartbeat good, blood pressure low...yeah! Back in 2 weeks.

One thing that I did notice though, when they were measuring me the nurse told the doctor I was measuring 30 weeks, but I am 32 weeks. He didnt' mention it at all or make an issue at all and said everything seemed "perfect". So, I guess I am just wondering if it is normal to be measuring a couple of weeks small? Or should I be worried?

anyways, hope you all have a lovely week! The weather here is still gorgeous and 15 degrees celcius! woo hoo for mild temps! Hopefully we don't see snow for another couple of months (or preferably not at all!)

LTB

Slow...

2010-10-15T10:40:00.000-07:00

Hello, hello bloggies! So happy that today is Friday....so sad that I have to supervise a school dance from 8-12am tonight. Fun, fun, fun! But what I really want to "complain" about is that I'm getting slow. At 31 weeks and 5 days I'm fading. Not faded out, but fading. I'm finding my bike ride to work more tiring. Hard to get my breath. This week I have had to stop on part of a hill and walk it for a few minutes. Not a big deal, but I'm feeling this now. Going up the stairs, I get winded. Need a break before continuing on! It's weird though b/c I can still kick ass on a 40min cardio session at the gym...I take a lot of breaks but still getting it in! I can't believe that I'm 5 weeks and 2 days away from being full term...I guess I'm lucky that I'm only fading out now.

Another development, or more of a development is the major discharge I've been having the past couple of weeks! Lots of people have talked about discharge, I never noticed it until about 32 weeks. Now I feel like i'm gushing all of the time! I've even charged to the bathroom a few times, worried that its blood! Crazy!

And finally...colostrum. sooooo freaky weird! If I squeeze my boob (don't ask me why i'm squeezing my boobs...?) clear/yellow fluid comes out. It is sometimes crusted on there like dried snot when I take off my bra. Gross. But cool.

So, ya....that's me at 31 weeks 5 day!

Have a good weekend!

LTB

31 Weeks

2010-10-12T10:12:00.001-07:00

How Far Along? 31 Weeks!!! Only 6 weeks to full term...WTF!!!!

Maternity Clothes? Some. Some regular stretchy stuff. Regular shirts are definitely getting too short!

Stretch Marks? No. Still hoping to avoid those! Hoping its genetic(my mom did NOT get them with all 4 kids!)

Sleep? No eating before bed seems to help the heartburn. I screwed up and ate Tostitos before bed last night...had a TERRIBLE sleep with lots of heartburn!

Best Moment of the Week? Thanksgiving dinners with the families! My sisters feeling the baby's feet sticking out of my side!

Movement? Awesome and lots. Sometimes the kicks take my breath away or make me very uncomfortable for a few moments. I think I'm getting braxton hicks too. I suddenly get VERY tight and sore, but it goes away.

Food Cravings? nothing really.

Gender? GIRL

What I miss? sleeping without heartburn!

What I'm looking forward to? Getting our nursery furniture soon! And setting up and decorating!

Weekly Wisdom: ?.

Milestones: ?

Emotions: Feeling good right now! But I am definitely tiring quicker and feeling less enthusiastic about doing "stuff" (ie. cleaning...walking the dog...)

Totally boring post and I promise to get pics soon! I've been super lazy! Sorry friends!

Yeah for a 4 day week!!

30 weeks!!! OMG!

2010-10-06T06:36:00.000-07:00

How Far Along? 30 weeks and 2 days!!! Woah....it is the final countdown! Hopefully I will never have to count past the 30's (40 exactly is ok...but 41...no thanks! Come on out by then baby girl!)

Maternity Clothes? Some. Some regular stretchy stuff.

Stretch Marks? No. Still hoping to avoid those! Hoping its genetic(my mom did NOT get them with all 4 kids!)

Sleep? No eating before bed seems to help the heartburn. I'm waking up with a really sore low back most days!

Best Moment of the Week? hitting 30 weeks! ordering the bedding! (now we just need the crib to put the bedding in!)

Movement? Crazy awesome movement! Had a freak out on Saturday...hubs has 2 friends who announced they were 3 months pregnant (without even "trying") and then in my random retarded jealousy and fear struck and I started panicking that I couldn't feel the baby move anymore and that they were all going to have perfect babies and i was going to have a still born. I over-reacted. She gave me a good kick session Saturday night! Phew! I hate that I am still so utterly jealous when I hear of people in real life being pregnant...I am still not confident in this pregnancy even though I'm so far along! oh...and i'm jealous of people who are pregnant with number 2...i may never get that chance. Geez...why am i'm worried about #2 when I don't even have #1 in my arms yet! I get so sad and frustrated at myself!

Food Cravings? Chocolate is soooo good, yet soooo bad (for my heartburn!!!)

Gender? GIRL

What I miss? sleeping without heartburn!

What I'm looking forward to? Thanksgiving weekend this week! Yeah! I'm excited to show my sisters some of the baby's crazy movements and to just be with my family! I'm also getting excited to buy our crib and get the nursery fully set up!

Weekly Wisdom: Not much.

Milestones: 30 weeks!

Emotions: Feeling good right now! But I can still get pretty irritated pretty quick!

Will get hubs to take some belly pics and put them up later!

Ciao for now!

Buzzzzz...........

2010-10-04T13:51:00.001-07:00

I pulled the trigger! I ordered our baby bedding online! I can't wait to get it in the mail(hoping i don't have to pay a shit load of duty on it since its from a US store!). We painted the nursery (ok, i did nothing...hubs did it all!) a pale yellow this weekend and it looks awesome! So today I ordered this 9 piece bedding set (not sure what all is included or what all I will actually use):

We are obviously having a bumblebee theme and I think its so cute! I didn't want anything too girly in case we are blessed with a second child and its a boy! All about re-using!

What do you guys think?

I'll give an official pic of our nursery when we get the crib and put the bedding in it!

:)LTB

29 weeker

2010-09-29T16:02:00.000-07:00

How Far Along? 29 weeks

Maternity Clothes? Some. Some regular stretchy stuff.

Stretch Marks? No. Still hoping to avoid those! But I have a random spider vein on my thigh now. Hate it.

Sleep? No eating before bed seems to help the heartburn. Lots of tossing and turning (which is a challenge with this belly) but not waking up more than once to pee!

Best Moment of the Week? Lots of goodies this week! Nursery painting has begun! Registering! OB appt and ultrasound where I saw that our little GIRL (100% girl confirmed) was doing perfectly! Confirmationg that I passed the Glucose test...however I am anemic and need to take iron (still wondering why I had to ASK about this and no one bothered to call or was planning on telling me!). And non-pregnancy related...getting 93% on my first assignment for my masters degree in math!

Movement? Crazy awesome movement! Feeling/seeing the baby move is definitely the best/coolest part of being pregnant! Definitely felling little arms/elbows/feet...feels like random hard bulges in my tummy!

Food Cravings? Lovin' that the halloween candy is out already! Oh Henry!

Gender? Got 100% confirmation that its a girl!

What I miss? Not much right now!

What I'm looking forward to? Finishing the nursery decorating! And hitting the 30 week mark in 6 days!

Weekly Wisdom: Being sick when you are pregnant is WAY worse than just being sick. I have had a cold for the past few days and it has made sleeping hard, and being awake painful! I'm feeling really run down and totally crappy. I haven't been to the gym in a week and I hate when I get off schedule like that b/c I always find it soooo hard to get back on track again. Oh well...I am trying to rest and not push myself in hopes this cold will clear up soon!

Milestones: Registry is pretty big. And I think we have names....Either Alyssa (nickname/short form Aly) or Alexandra (nickname/short form Ali)...clearly I really like the name Ali! Preferences? Alyssa or Alexandra? Oh...and Samantha is on the list too (but after those two!)

Emotions: Just tired and sickish. Starting to feel anxious about having a little one depend on me...FOREVER! eek!

Well, I'm off to my favorite spot these days....the couch. Gotta watch the Dexter episode I missed on Sunday!

LTB

I Registered!

2010-09-26T09:00:00.000-07:00

Yesterday was a major milestone and I can't believe that this is so REAL now! I made a baby registry! I went with my mom (is this weird that I didn't go with my husband? ) Husband and my dad were at the house painting the nursery (and the bathrooms and the master bedroom!). Since hubs isn't really a fan of shopping, let alone wandering through a baby store with no clue what to do, I decided to go with my mom who obviously knows what stuff we need. Here are some highlights of what I registered for:

highchair (nice wooden one)
breast feeding pillow
car seat
diaper bag (i'm getting the JJ Cole System bag)
soothers
bottles
bumbo
a swing thing that rocks the baby
diaper genie
play mat with a mobile thing you can put over it
first aid kit with cute little nail file and nail clippers !
change pad to go on the dresser
Baby on Board! Sign!!!
Baby monitors
bath tub thing
swaddle blankets

Going to add: a kangaroo carrier thing, breast pump, snow suit, bedding

We already have or are buying ourselves: stoller,crib, dresser/change table, room decorations, bjorn

Anything else you suggest we get? I had no idea what I need and was very overwhelmed in that store!

Definitely a fun milestone though!

29 week update coming soon!

28 weeks! Single digits to Full Term!

2010-09-20T10:33:00.000-07:00

How Far Along? 28 weeks

Maternity Clothes? Had to give back all of the maternity clothes my friend gave me...she's 10 weeks preg! I'm sporting lots of tights and non-maternity A-line shirts. Current dilema: i'm normally obsessed with lululemon casual pants but my current ones don't fit...i don't want to pay $100 to get a new pair in a HUGE size that (hopefully) won't fit me after the baby! I don't know where to find similar and affordable casual lounge pants that are suitable for a preggo! Any suggestions?

Stretch Marks? No. Still hoping to avoid those! But I have a random spider vein on my thigh now. Hate it.

Sleep? Too many middle of the night mini-bile-barfs are making me crazy. This heartburn is HORRID! I think I will just have to stop eating past 6pm...but them i'm sure I'll wake up with a grumbling tummy in the middle of the night! I think this might be a lose-lose situation at this point!

Best Moment of the Week? Buying paint for the nursery! And NOT getting a call from my OB after my glucose test! Yeah for no diabetes! And.....we bought our stroller! The uppababy vista! Love it! Actually my generous MIL bought it for us!

Movement? Crazy awesome movement! Feeling/seeing the baby move is definitely the best/coolest part of being pregnant!

Food Cravings? Not really.

Gender? Ultrasound next week will hopefully confirm its a girl! I'm really nervous they were wrong the first time and I will be in for a shock at delivery!

What I miss? Sleeping through the night! I think that's gone for a long long long time!

What I'm looking forward to? Ultrasound next Monday to check on placenta and hopefully re-check the gender! And going to register/shop at Babies R Us this weekend with my mom!

Weekly Wisdom: ?

Milestones: Making it to the single-digit-week countdown to full term! 9 weeks to go!

Emotions: I'm cranky when I'm tired. I was super snappy at hubs Friday night. I just can't help it and I don't know what I want from him. Pretty much he is just screwed! Saturday he bought me beautiful flowers and that combined with a good night sleep I was much happier and more pleasant to be around on Saturday.

Here are a few pics of the belly from a wedding we went to on Saturday. It's getting BIG!

Hope you all have a great week! So happy its already Wednesday! I can't wait until the weekend so we can get painting the baby room!!!!

LTB

Ups and Downs...

2010-09-13T10:58:00.001-07:00

Hey everyone! This week has had a lot of ups and downs for me. First the downer stuff:

I fell off my bike. My bike tire got stuck in a subway track and hit my head on the pavement (got a lovely goose egg!), really bruised my hip and hurt my wrist. Thank the lord that baby is fine! I didn't land on my tummy at all but of course I was still freaking out. I went home and immediately doppler-ed and felt for kicks. Luckily h/b and movement has been excellent. I am now thinking it is time to retire the bicycle. But I'm having a REALLY hard time with that. It is my only mode of transportation around the city, including to work! I mean, I could take the bus or subway...but it is not direct or convenient at all! I could walk to work but it will take a LOOOONGG time and if Iwant to go to the gym after work that will be like an extra hour of walking to get there and home! We have a car but driving in the city sucks. There is no parking at my work, if you are lucky you can get a spot on the street and pay. So driving is a really crappy option too. Ugh....

I had to do my Gestational Diabetes test today and I friggin' hated it! That orange crap left me wanting to puke my brains out. I managed to hold it in for the hour and then had a spontaneous mini-barf of whatever was left of that orange crap.

I started my first course of my Master's of Math degree that I am doing part-time online. It had me a bit overwhelmed this past week.

I hate getting up early. Work(ie. highschool ) starts WAY too early!!!!

I have a new pregnancy symptom: I permanetely feel like I have to poo. Pressure on the butt, BIG TIME! Baby must be pressing there. It sucks.

Gross new/but kind of cool pregnancy symptom: My nipples are leaking fluid ( a really little bit)! I noticed they looked like there was dried snot (yuck!) on them a few days ago, I picked it off and then squeezed a bit and a drop of clear fluid came out! OB said this was good...seems weird to me!

The UPS:

I'm 27 weeks!

Welcome to 3rd trimester!

I book an u/s for 2 weeks to see if my placenta moved and also hopefully get another peak at gender to reassure us it is a girl before we buy too much stuff!

We bought a new leather couch and chair and book shelf! All part of getting ready for baby!

Mother-in-law is going to buy our STROLLER! Holy generous! We have decided on the Uppababy Vista!

My shower is booked for Nov 6th!

Maternity photos will be the week of Nov 13th! Can't wait for these! And we are getting a package where we get a newborn session as well! Woo hoo!

Ok, gotta run! Lots of love to all the bloggies! Some of the blogs I read have AMAZING things happening! Sassy Infertile Lady got her adopted baby boy yesterday! So beautiful! Steph from Baby Blakely is on the verge of giving birth! And Egg saw 2 beautiful babies on her 3D u/s!

LTB

26 Weeker!

2010-09-07T09:34:00.000-07:00

How Far Along? 26 weeks

Maternity Clothes? Now that I'm back to work I'm wearing my new maternity pants and realizing I will definitely need more shirts! The t-shirts I've been wearing all summer that now chronically creep up are not going to cut it here!

Stretch Marks? No. Still hoping to avoid those! But I have a random spider vein on my thigh now. Hate it.

Sleep? Sucky this weekend! Had a bout of Restless leg syndrome that kept me up to 5am on Saturday night- I think I may have identified the culprit: Zantac (heartburn prescription from OB since Maalox gave me diarreah!!). Will be avoiding that now but that leaves me with uncontrollably painful gross heartburn at night. Woke up a zillion times sunday night with stomach acid mini-barfs. Gross gross gross! Trying to sleep being more propped up with pillows now. Not too comfy. Last night I caved and took a sleeping pill to get myself to sleep so I could function at work today.

Best Moment of the Week? Seeing people oooh and ahhh over my pregnant belly at work. But now it's been a week of that and I'm over it and sick of making small talk with people who would otherwise not even talk to me! oh well!

Movement? Alot. And now I can feel it when I'm walking around and doing stuff and not just focusing on it sitting still. I love to watch my tummy make alien movements! My sisters saw/felt it this weekend too which was awesome!

Food Cravings? Not really.

Gender? We'll get another look and hopefully confirm that she is in fact a girl soon!

What I miss? Sleeping in. Not working. hmmm....but nothing pregnancy related!

What I'm looking forward to? Passing Glucose test next week (Yes...I plan on passing! I am not good at "dieting" and would HATE the diabetes diet!) and my OB appt on Monday!

Weekly Wisdom: I'm pretty brain dead this week...blaming lack of sleep!

Milestones: I had to take out my belly button ring. It started ripping out and really hurting. I am contemplating getting a "maternity ring" for it but I have to order it online and getting stuff shipped to Canada sucks. Duty, taxes, fees...ugh. I don't want it to grow in though!

Emotions: I'm edgy. Irritable. Tired? I'm not being the "nicest" to my hubs which I feel bad about and will make more of an effort to be nicer! Husbands are just the easiest ones to take it out on (whatever "it" is!) Sometimes I can't even figure out what i'm pissed at. Can I blame it on hormones? Or maybe I'm really just a bitch. :( Poor hubs.

Here are a bunch of week 26 belly pics, clothed belly, bare belly and Cosmo loving the little belly shelf to rest his head on! ha ha!

Have a great week everyone!

LTB

Back to Work

2010-09-02T08:36:00.000-07:00

I'm back at it. Teaching. Full days. Ugh. This week I am teaching an easy "Get Ready" math course for 4 kids at my school (full real school starts next week). I have been dreading going back to work for the whole summer. But I have to say I am impressed with myself so far. This week is a good warm up for next week's chaos. But, I'm not too tired, I've still been getting to the gym after work, and I feel good! I was worried that waking up early would kill me and I would hate being here. But I really love the kids, and math, and my colleagues! Plus there is the added bonus of having everyone comment on my baby bump! I actually totally LOVE it (for now!) The students are so cute and nice! Actually i think everyone is nicer to pregnant people. Which is great for me NOW but pissed the hell out of me when I was TTC! Being pregnant really doesn't warrant "special niceness"! We should be nice to EVERYONE (except assholes!) regardless of their bun-in-the-oven status. Actually, we should be NICER to infertiles who are TTC! It sucks and they are the ones that need the love!!! This is something that truly does tick me off big time and I don't want to forget about it now that I'm on the "other side".

It's weird though, even though I'm pregnant now, I still get annoyed/anxious/jealous whenever I hear about other people being pregnant! I keep thinking something is going to go wrong with my pregnancy and I'll be stuck with nothing and they will have their cute baby! Or, it just sends me flashbacks of not being pregnant and hearing about new pregnancies. And I just hate hearing about people who get preggo after like 2 months of "trying". I know I shouldn't be jealous since it is a "bad" trait but I can't help it! I wish I could be the only one that I know IRL who is pregnant, until the birth of my baby and then whoever the heck else wants to get pregnant can have their turn!

Anyone else have these feelings? or am I just an asshole?

Also, wondering if anyone has heard from BasicGirl in a while? She hasn't posted in forever and I loved following her pregnancy since she cycled right around the same time as me! If anyone has an update on her I would love to know! And BasicGirl...if you are reading this...post something! Miss you!

Hope you all have a great week (Thursday already!!!) I'll post a 25 week update (a few days late...ooops!) later!

LTB

24 weeks! Viability!!!

2010-08-24T18:20:00.000-07:00

How Far Along? 24 weeks

Maternity Clothes? No new purchases but now that the weather is getting relatively cooler I might need to get another pair of jeans because I only have one pair and I won't be able to wear cute summer dresses much longer.

Stretch Marks? No.

Sleep? No problems. I'm scared for next week though when I return to work. I think I might be very sleepy! I have been on a horrible schedule of going to sleep around 2am and waking up around 11am! It'll be tough to switch to 7am wake ups!

Best Moment of the Week? Viability day! Had a non-eventful OB appt yesterday. It was great to be told I was growing perfect, 4 pound weight gain (good since I gained nothing between 16 and 20 weeks), great b.p. and scheduled my next appt for 3 weeks for my glucose test (ugh).
And registering for prenatal classes at my hospital! We have to start them a bit earlier than I hoped since they have one session from Sept 22-Oct27 and another from Nov 10-Dec 15 (which will be too late for us!) Oh well! The classes are 6:30-8:30 on Wed evenings.

Movement? Lots! I can feel it and see it! And the other morning I woke up and had a really weird shaped belly. I felt around and there was one circle area that was totally sticking out and harder. It was definitely a head or a butt sticking out! Very cool!

Food Cravings? Not really.

Gender? We'll get another look and hopefully confirm that she is in fact a girl in about 6 weeks!

What I miss? Nothing. Except being in early July and still having a ton of my summer left! It is coming to an end too fast!!!

What I'm looking forward to? If I have to go back to work....I'm looking forward to seeing my students who didn't know I was pregnant and will be excited to see my belly!

Weekly Wisdom: Baby gear is freakin' expensive!!!! Figure we will spend around $4000-$5000 on crib, stroller, car seat, change table, glider! That's nuts! Oh and hubs thought we could just buy a stoller off Craigslist like this:

No joke. He got a rude awakening!!!

Milestones: V-day!

Emotions: Pretty good. Just feeling sad and a bit "homesick". Now that we are having a baby I wish we lived closer to my family. I know we are only an hour away but its just not the same as being able to just stop in for a chat or for dinner at any time!

Here are my 24 week pics. Notice my cutie Cosmo inspecting my belly in the last one! Ha ha! I love him!

Hope you all have a wonderful day! And if you have a chance go over and wish EGG a HUGE congrats on her TWINS!!!! Both her and A+B had some great luck with Dr. Awesome!!! Congrats guys!

LTB

Old Friends, New Life

2010-08-22T10:15:00.000-07:00

I'm feeling kind of sad, weird, homesick this weekend. I live about an hour and a bit away from my hometown (where my parents live). I really love living in the BIG city but I really crave living in the same town as my parents and siblings. I feel like a big suck but I want to cry everytime I leave. I went there on Friday to spend the day with my mom and then go to dinner with some old friends (my very best friends from elementary school, through high school and university). I am still pretty close with one of my 3 best friends, she has a baby and I feel totally comfortable hanging out with her whenever I'm in town. The other two felt really weird to be around. One of them lives in Montreal and was married, cheated on her hubby, moved in with "new guy" and now is divorced. She was at the dinner party with "new guy". Now, I'm not one to judge...(maybe that's a bit of a lie actually...) but all I can think when I look at her is "cheater!" . I just get bad vibes being around her. I feel like we can't do any reminiscing about old times because the ex-hubs was always around in the old days (they were HS sweethearts.) so its like I have NOTHING to talk about with her. And she wasn't at all interested in my pregnancy. Not that I need people swooning over me, but she didn't even ask how I was feeling or about symptoms or anything. Weird for a "best friend". I didn't know what to talk about with her, can I ask about her budding relationship with "new guy"? their marriage/kids plans? is her divorce final? everything seems taboo and she doesn't really open up about her "new life" at all. It made me sad. I have new friends now in my new life, and I have wonderful things happening. But it is tough to make friendships now like those that built over my childhood. We did everything together! we were crazy, we cried, we laughed, we totally grew up together and knew everything about each other. Now we are total strangers and I don't know how to make that bond with new girls that I meet now as an adult! I will never want to talk on the phone for hours with a new girlfriend like I did with my HS friends. I will likely never sit and watch tv for hours eating chips with new girlfriends. I will never break rules and sneak out and laugh until I pee my pants with my new girlfriends. We just don't have the time to build the bonds as adults that we did when we were kids. It makes me sad. I miss that honest, real, easy friendship I knew so well as a "young" person. I don't really know where this post is going or what its really about but I'm feeling sad. I think I miss being a kid sometimes. Living with my mommy. Playing with my friends. Life changes and sometimes it makes me sentimental. :(

On that note, I think I'll go call my mom :)

LTB

23 Week Update

2010-08-17T18:11:00.000-07:00

How Far Along? 23 weeks

Maternity Clothes? I went on a shopping spree today! I got 2 great pairs of under-the-belly black work pants (I hate the belly panel!). I got one pair of the Heidi Klum brand ones that are a skinny fit (and they were only $40!) and the second pair is just Thyme maternity brand, with more of a bootcut/flare . Both are perfect for going back to work in a week and a half! eeek! I also bought 3 new shirts at a non-maternity store. But they are longer fitting shirts so they won't ride up, because I am frequently dealing with the bare-belly peeking out from under my t-shirts these days! I don't think it's too appropriate for work! I'm really happy with my purchases! I'm going to give hubs a fashion show and get him to take some pics and I'll post them! I haven't worn anything but work out clothes and comfy clothes all summer since I'm off!

Stretch Marks? No.

Sleep? No troubles sleeping unless I get a heartburn attack!

Best Moment of the Week? Buying cute maternity stuff was fun! It was also great coming back from Miami (even though it cleared up and because beautiful for the 2nd half of our week) and picking up Cosmo from my parents! I missed my little guy!

Movement? Lots! But I get nervous when I don't feel it for a while. Mostly I don't notice it unless I'm sitting still. If I'm moving around I don't notice movement at all.

Food Cravings? Wood-oven thin crust pizza from the Italian restos in Sobe! Yummmm!

Gender? Girl! But I've had several people ask me when my "son" is due! Apparently I'm carrying like its a boy??? Not sure what to think of this wives tale? Anyone believe this stuff? I'm nervous that now I'm all set on girl and then its going to turn out to be a boy! Afterall the tech wasn't 10000% sure it was a girl! Maybe the wee-wee was hiding???

What I miss? Not having heartburn (or diarrhea...for more details see yesterday's post...but beware of TMI!)

What I'm looking forward to? V-DAY!!! Viability that is! And my 24 week appt next Tuesday!

Weekly Wisdom: Maalox causes diarrhea. Heartburn sucks, but diarrhea sucks too. And also that maternity clothes aren't ALL ugly!

Milestones: No biggies this week.

Emotions: Pretty good. My freak outs have been minimal (except for in Miami when it was raining and I was going nuts!) Starting to get the nesting instinct. And its scaring me. I don't want to get ahead of myself! When did anyone else start planning/buying/decorating for baby? Or when do you plan to? I don't want to get all ready and excited and then have something go wrong!

A few Q's for anyone who may have thought about this stuff:

What stroller do you like? I'm debating between uppababy vista and Orbit G2. Are these more expensive ones worth it or does Graco do the trick?

Thoughts on Baby Bjorn?

Dutallier Gliders? Worth the big bucks or just get a cheaper one? Any recommendations?

And here are some 22.5 week belly pics from when we were in Miami last week. Ignore my stupid looking facial expressions and post-ocean hair!

:)LTB

Heartburn or Diarrhea...you choose.

2010-08-16T18:35:00.000-07:00

At my last OB appointment I mentioned that I have been having terrible heartburn and tums basically suck shit. So he told me to take Maalox and feel free to just chug it when needed because its safe. So, I've been chugging Maalox as needed (probably 2-3 times a day, about 2 tbsps each time). For the past few weeks I've been having diarrhea EVERY single day. Not like explosive liquid crampy diarrhea but every poo I take is wet. I know this is so gross and I apologize for tmi! This is bothersome in itself but now my butt is also so irritated that it is itchy and burning and I hate wiping because it hurts! I was getting concerned about what the hell this diarrhea is from, and then it hit me. I got the diarrhea right when I started taking Maalox! Soooo.... I consulted Dr. Google and he confirmed that diarrhea is very common with Maalox (and all other oral liquid antacids). In an effort to find an alternative, I asked a pharmasist today and he basically told me I was out of luck. He said I had to choose the lesser of two evils. Heartburn or Diarrhea? Which would you choose? This sucks!!! I'm going to for sure ask my OB at my appt in a week and hopefully he'll have more options for me! For now, I think I'm going to try to avoid the Maalox as much as possible. I am sick of being held hostage by my bowels! I even had a huge embarrasing moment last week(beware of even more TMI!) I was hit by a bout of uncontrollable diarrhea while on a hike with hubby...It was either in my pants (picture Charlotte in SATC movie) or drop it in the woods while him and Cosmo stood on the look out for passer-bys! Had to wipe with my undies and leave them in the woods...It doesn't get worse than this! So, wish me luck with my heartburn tonight. Any natural suggestions from anyone?

23 week update tomorrow!

LTB

Pouting in Miami

2010-08-08T10:33:00.000-07:00

I'm sad and disappointed. We got to South Beach last night and today we have not seen a second of sunlight. It is pouring rain and the forecast calls for rain all week. We have no car. We are bored. I want to go home. I'm such a beach/sun person that this really ruins my trip. Plus, we thought there was a gym here (somewhere good to atleast kill a couple hours) but apparently that was false advertising and there is a private gym that you can't go to. WTF? why would they advertise that on the condo listing? Assholes.

So this is my pouting post. Please cross your fingers for a bit of sun for me, otherwise this is going to be a LOOOONG week!

LTB

21 weeks! More than half way there!

2010-08-02T19:12:00.000-07:00

How Far Along? 21 weeks

Maternity Clothes? Still not wearing any but I have missed wearing jeans for the past few months and the ones my friend gave me are a bit too long. So, I took the plunge and bought a pair at Thyme Maternity with my mom this weekend. The problem is I'm one of the very few women who don't like those stupid bands that come up over the belly. I like my pants to just sit below the belly. Since I am obviously a weird one with this preference, there really isn't a lot of choice for pants. There was only one below belly style and so I got them. I'm a bit unsure about them still and might head to H & M and Old Navy this week and see what they've got (and hopefully cheaper)!

Stretch Marks? No.

Sleep? No troubles!

Best Moment of the Week? Feeling more and more real kicks and flip flops from our little baby girl! Also, my mom felt the kicks with her hand on my tummy this weekend! Soooo exciting to have someone else acknowledge that they are REAL! Hubs was away this weekend so he is a little miffed that my mom got to cop the first feel! ha ha! His turn will come this week I hope!
Oh, and another cool thing is my belly button is inching out. It used to be a mega-innie but it is becoming more shallow and almost flat with my belly! I LOVE it! I really want a pregnancy-induced outie!!!

Movement? Yup. See above!

Food Cravings? Nah. I'm finding that I get really full really fast and so my eyes are bigger than my stomach these days. I actually have been disappointed that I have had to skip dessert or bread at a couple of meals out this week due to being STUFFED!

Gender? Girl!

What I miss? Nothing. I love this stage of preg.

What I'm looking forward to? Hubby feeling the kicks! Belly getting BIGGER! Trip to South Beach Miami this weekend! We rented a condo on the beach (on Collins Ave I think...) for a week starting this coming Saturday!

Weekly Wisdom: ? Malox is AMAZING! My doc recommended it for the heartburn I've been having and it has worked wonders this week!!!

Milestones: Over half way done this pregnancy!

Emotions: Feeling good this week. I had a bout of lonliness on Friday when hubby left for the weekend and I had nothing to do all day and night....I suddenly got very anxious! But I called a friend and hung out for the whole day and was cheered up really quick! Then I headed to my parents for the rest of the weekend. It was great.

I have no pics for this week but I'm sure the bump is about the same as last week!

Kind of a boring post but I just want to keep a record of my weekly progress, to both share with you all and to keep as a memory for myself!

:)LTB

20 weeks and the BIG ultrasound

2010-07-26T10:14:00.000-07:00

So today I had my 20 week big scan. It took FOREVER! Like over an hour. I had a medical student doing it and she was really stressing me out b/c she was contorting her face all over the place! Now I realize she was just concentrating really hard! Then the real tech came in and made me much more comfortable! Everything looked great, measured great, baby was very active! I can't believe I'm not feeling more movement than I am! The only "concern" was that I have a low lying placenta but it is not even THAT low so she said it will probably fully move out of the way and I won't need a c-section. In fact she said she would bet her RRSP'S that I won't need a c-section due to the placenta. But, on the upside, I get an extra u/s at about 30 weeks to double check it! woo hoo!

And without further ado.....It looks like we are having a GIRL!!!! I gotta say...I knew it! ha ha!

Anyways, I had a great week/weekend since it was my littlest sister's wedding. We had a lot of fun and I was definitely showing so it was exciting to see a lot of old family friends and relatives who I don't see often and didn't know I was pregnant. I had a great weekend but I'm exhausted now!

In terms of weight gain: phew...i gained zero from my 16 week appt and the doc didn't seemed concerned! I was worried I would see another 10 pound gain like I did during the first trimester!

In terms of belly growth: it's big now. Fully out. Belly button is starting to push out and I am going to have to take out my belly ring soon for sure! A lot of my old t-shirts are getting too short!

In terms of symptoms: heart burn. Big time. This week I woke up choking on my own bile. DISGUSTING and painful! I got the ok from the doc today to take liquid gaviscon or malox. I'm going to buy some today for sure! Nothing else really except when I sit for a long time I feel really cramped in my abdomen area.

What I miss: NOTHING!!!!

I'm off to finish reading my current fave book: The girl with the dragon tattoo

It starts a bit slow but I highly reccommend it !

And I leave you with a few pics from my beautiful sister's wedding!!

Here is a pic of my brother's girlfriend, me, my sister and another bridesmaid and my other sister...the bride!

Here is a pic of me, my mom and dad and my other sister.

Here is a pic of me and my 3 siblings!

And this is a pic of me and my hubs before the wedding.

19 week Update

2010-07-20T09:37:00.000-07:00

How Far Along? 19 weeks

Maternity Clothes? Still not wearing any. Summer is a great time to just wear loose dresses and tights with long shirts! It's working for me!

Stretch Marks? No.

Sleep? Debating getting the Snoogle...is it worth it? Or can a couple pillows do the same trick?

Best Moment of the Week? The totally nice comments I got from 2 strangers this past week! One guy saw me heading to the gym as he was heading to his office and he said "Don't you get a 9 month free pass not to work out since you're pregnant!" He was joking around and being totally nice. It really caught me off guard though! Then my second comment came from a personal trainer at my gym who told me she just noticed I was pregnant and that I looked "great" and to "keep it up". That was nice too!

Movement? I'm 90% sure that I can feel the baby. I often second guess myself that it is just gas but i'm pretty sure it's baby!

Food Cravings? Just hating chicken. But, I really never love chicken anyways.

Gender? Only 6 days to go!

What I miss? Nothing except less heartburn. It is getting me every evening!

What I'm looking forward to? Anatomy scan in 6 days and my sister's wedding this coming weekend!

Weekly Wisdom: ? nothin'

Milestones: Strangers noticing my pregnancy!

Emotions: I've been more calm this week. No major blow ups or break downs! Just feeling good!

Here are 2 pics of me a week ago at 18 weeks:

Have a great week everyone!

LTB

Stranger Comments

2010-07-16T11:25:00.000-07:00

I got my first pregnancy "stranger" comments! In fact, I got 2 of them this week! I didn't really know how to respond. Was I mad? Did I think that meant I looked "fat"? Were they serious? And then I realized...Yippee! I love this! I am officially pregnant and the whole world can see!
I can handle the comments...but note to strangers: Look but don't touch!!!

Now, I just need to go with the positive flow and stop obsessing about the fact that my 20 week ultrasound is in 9 days and I'm scared something is going to be wrong. I pray my little one is PERFECT!!!

:) Have a wonderful weekend!

LTB

18 weeks

2010-07-13T10:26:00.000-07:00

How Far Along? 18 weeks

Maternity Clothes? My good friend just gave me a HUGE bag of maternity clothes! She had a baby a year and a half ago and she is about the same size as me so hopefully they will fit! I got a few pairs of jeans, 3 pairs of work pants, cords, 3 skirts, a jean dress, and about 15 shirts/sweaters! Amazing! So I doubt I will be doing much maternity shopping!!!

Stretch Marks? No.

Sleep? Pillow between the legs is helping keep me comfy!

Best Moment of the Week? I wore my new bikini to a pool this week and a girl I barely know came and told me how "great" I look and she even said my belly was "so pretty"! I loved the flattery and the acknowledgment that I am really pregnant and it is obvious to more than just me!

Movement? I had some stomach problems on Sunday afternoon but then Sunday night I felt some "twitches" in my tummy. Not sure if it was gas or babes? I felt something today too, but again, I'm so gassy lately that it really is hard to tell the difference!

Food Cravings? Nothing in particular.

Gender? We find out in 13 days! I think girl. My friend who gave me the clothes thinks boy, due to the way that I'm "carrying". I'm not really sure what that means but whatever! We both have a 50/50 chance of being right!!!

What I miss? Nothing. I love this phase of pregnancy!

What I'm looking forward to? Anatomy scan in 2 weeks!

Weekly Wisdom: Don't eat too much at once. Heartburn is a bitch.

Milestones: Seeing a ton of people who I haven't seen since pregnancy at a wedding on the weekend. It was cool to be acknowledged and talk openly about the babe!

Emotions: I'm still all over the place. Way more emotional than usual! I blow up and then calm down really quickly. I feel bad for hubby who gets the brunt of it! I'm also starting to get really anxious about the anatomy scan. I'm nervous somehting is going to be wrong or the babe won't be growing properly. I'm trying to just overpower this anxiety with the excitement of finding out the sex!

That's my quicky update! Nothing else too exciting over here! I just made homemade canneloni and tomatoe sauce and now I'm heading to the gym so that I can eat a ton of my pasta tonight without feeling too guilty!!! (oh...but not toooo much...heartburn...can't forget that!)

LTB

Haters

2010-07-11T07:29:00.000-07:00

In particular....dog haters. I hate them. I am completely blown away how people can HATE and think a tiny 5 pound chihuahua is DISGUSTING! WTF!

Story behind this rant:

We went to a wedding last night with my husband's mother, his sister and his sister's husband. It turned into a brutal night of drama (as I should have expected considering his family is full of drama ALL of the time!) Most of it came from BIL, who may I remind you is the one who told me his wife was a fat cow when she was pregnant and I was lucky I wasn't the one who had to sleep with her! He's a total arrogant ass.

So, last weekend BIL and SIL went to Montreal and left there 2 month old baby as MIL's for the weekend. Since MIL owns a hair salon and Saturday is a super busy day hubs and I decided that to be nice we would offer to go there and babysit all day Saturday so she didn't have to cancel her clients. We proposed this idea weeks before they were leaving and everyone agreed, and we were really excited to spend time with our nephew!

Then comes last Friday night. MIL calls and tells us she isn't going to work anymore b/c all of her appts cancelled (ya right!), but of course still expects us to come for a visit. Fine. I'm annoyed b/c she always changes plans on us and now we are forced to drive and hour there at 8am and spend the WHOLE day (not fun in my opionion!). But whatever. We go. I joke that she doesn't trust us with the baby...not really taking it too seriously. So we spend the whole day with bossy MIL, handicapped cranky FIL and our nephew (and of course our puppy Cosmo...)

Fast forward to last night...SIL comes us to me and tells me that the reason that MIL didn't go to work is because she and BIL didn't trust that I would keep my dog off of their baby! Then BIL has a "talk" with my hubs. He tells my husband that he doesn't want our dog in the same house as his kid, and that hubby's parents and sister hate the dog and don't want him around but are scared to tell us. He said that he doesn't want Cosmo's (the dog) fur in the vicinity of his baby's breathing. And he asked why I thought it was ok to bring our dog to other people's houses. He pretty much expected my husband to agree with him and say that Cosmo will never be around again. But my husband made me proud. He told BIL that we would never let Cosmo maul his baby but if he doesn't want Cosmo around then he will likely see less of us. We work all week and on the weekends we are not going to leave Cosmo home alone whenever we go out of town for the entire day! (All of my inlaws live an hour away). I was so pissed off. He is so lame. I hate people that hate dogs (ok, not really ...but you get my point). And in our defence, we only bring our dog to our family's houses and if we ever want to bring him any where else we ALWAYS ask...but that rarely happens anyways. He doesn't understand that having a dog is a responsibility and we have adopted Cosmo into our family and I LOVE him with all of my heart! At the moment we have NO kids and Cosmo is our baby! I can't believe how much of a dick he is. So, who knows what will happen now. Obviously more drama will ensue...as per usual with BIL!

Anyways, if you made it this far and love dogs...tell me about your pups! I love them more than I love my in laws for sure!

Love you Cosmo! xoxo

17 weeks and a few belly pics!

2010-07-05T22:23:00.001-07:00

How Far Along? 17 weeks

Maternity Clothes? Nope. But I bought a new bikini (with a bigger bra size!) to wear to the beach on Sunday. I thought I would be self conscious but now that my "bump" is more "bumpish" and harder so it doesn't look flabby I felt great in my bikini!

Stretch Marks? No.

Sleep? Usually yes. Last night woke up at 4am starving! I tried to ignore it and fall back asleep but I wasn't very successful. Finally fell asleep for a few more hours.

Best Moment of the Week? My tummy "popped". I officially look pregnant. And I love it.

Movement? Can't wait for this to start!

Food Cravings? Nope. Just hating chicken and steak.

Gender? We find out in 20 days! I think girl. We'll see!

What I miss? Nothing. I love this phase of pregnancy!

What I'm looking forward to? Anatomy scan in 3 weeks!

Weekly Wisdom: Don't go to bed hungry!

Milestones: Sporting the bump in the bikini!

Emotions: I'm still all over the place. Way more emotional than usual!

And now here are a few progress pics. But as a disclaimer I don't think they actually do the "bump" justice! I need to pull my pants down a bit lower and do some front shots I think!

7 weeks

12 weeks (a bit more bloat) and sorry...I don't have a clue how to rotate this picture.

13 weeks

15 weeks

17 weeks

Have a great day!

:) LTB

16 week update

2010-07-02T09:11:00.000-07:00

How Far Along? 16 weeks and 4 days

Maternity Clothes? No. And I'm not sure if I will ever take the plunge. I found some really cute non-maternity A-line shirts and dresses that do the trick just fine with tights! Woo hoo! All super cheap from H&M. I'm glad that the boho-chic A-line style is in right now! I also tried on my size 2 bridesmaid dress that I'm supposed to wear to my sister's wedding in 3 weeks. When I got it I was going to have to get it taken in around the boobs and waist and shortened but now it fits perfect! But the bump is totally obvious. I thought I would feel self conscious in the dress but I actually like how it accentuates my bump! I'm excited to wear it now and actually look somewhat pregnant!

Stretch Marks? No.

Sleep? Good. Except that my summer break always causes trouble for me and hubs. He still works. I like to stay up late watching tv in bed. Despite the ear plugs and face mask he wears the tv still bugs him and so I can't watch tv. booo.

Best Moment of the Week? This wasn't such a great week actually! Appointment was fine on Monday but it was downhill from there. Wednesday was a HUGE fight with the husband (cried all day...but he came home with roses and we had a great talk and all is fine). Also, Thursday car got its first scratch...a big one. I found it, don't know where the heck it came from but I knew it would make hubby FURIOUS. I really didn't want to rock the boat after our huge fight and make-up on Wednesday. Sucky. We are getting it fixed on Monday.

Movement? Can't wait for this to start!

Food Cravings? Nope.

Gender? I'm still thinking girl. Only 3.5 weeks till we find out!!!

What I miss? Nothing much this week. I guess it kind of sucks being an emotional basketcase! I'm normally not a crier. And I have cried this week and last week! It's so foreign to me!

What I'm looking forward to? Date night tonight, beach on Sunday! And in terms of the babe....next big OB appt with the anatomy ultrasound!

Weekly Wisdom: Marriage is hard work but so worth it! Talking things out always makes things awesome again!

Milestones: My tummy is officially pregnant looking and losing the "just fat" look!

Emotions: Up and down! Up and down!

I'm heading out to the mall to do the dreaded first bathing suit shop as a pregnant lady! I need a suit for Sunday! Could be scary! Wish me luck!

LTB

16 week appointment

2010-06-28T09:13:00.000-07:00

First off I just want to tell people who don't know what the G20 is (I had a few comments with people asking). It is a meeting of a group (20 I guess) of politial leaders from around the world who come together to discuss finances and budgets and debts etc. It happens every year and it rotates which country is the host. Last year it was in Italy. And unfortunately this year it was Canada's turn to host. Since Obama and all the other big wigs were in town there was massive security/road closures etc put in place and of course people protesting whatever since they know there will be a lot of media and attention given during this time. Among these peaceful protesters there are always trouble makers. They are anarchists (called the Black Bloc) that basically hate police and came to Toronto to destroy our property, taunt our police, and turn the city into a riot town. Totally annoying and disgusting. Hopefully now that the G20 is over they will all get the heck out of here and leave my city alone!

Ok, now that I go that off my chest, onto my appt today.
Today marks 16 weeks. My OB appointment was a bit disappointing. As in, nothing happened. It took literally 2 minutes. Called in...weighed...blood pressure....doppler....sent to get blood taken. Done.

The doppler was cool but since I have one at home it wasn't as cool or amazing as it would be had I never heard my little one's hb before. It was very anti-climatic.
One thing however did stress me out BIG TIME! Pre-pregnancy and I guess pre-fertility drugs I weighed 101 pounds at my physical (January). Today I weighed 110 pounds. I don't own a scale and I never weigh myself at home since weight and numbers are things I can definitely obsess about. I used to be a compulsive exerciser so I have some "issues".
My doctor didn't seem overly concerned but said we will just start watching it now. He said to watch the juice ( I don't drink any juice) and carbs (I don't eat many carbs). So basically I feel like an cow. Mostly though I just feel out of control. To be honest I haven't been eating more than usual really, I did stop exercising for the first trimester due to bedrest and spotting but now I'm back to having great workouts! So why the hell am I gaining so much weight so fast? I know I shouldn't be fretting over weighing 110 pounds and its not the number that I am afraid of, its the unexplained weight gain and the fear of what's to come if this rate of gain keeps up or increases! Don't get me wrong, I feel incredibly blessed and grateful for this little baby I'm growing and I would happily have gained a ton more weight now IF I could explain where the heck it is coming from! Ugh. I feel guilty and sick and for even worrying about this when I should just be happy that atleast I am pregnant and have made it this far. But honestly I still have that nagging doubt in my head that something is going to go wrong and I am going to lose this baby and then I will still have gained this weight for NOTHING! And I will be devasted and fat too. If you feel like punching me I totally understand, and trust me I'm beating myself up for these thoughts too big time.

Anyways, aside from this bullshit my appt went well, everything was fine and I go back in 4 weeks for my BIG anatomy ultrasound. Boy or Girl? I'm thinking (and guiltily hoping) girl. But of course will totally love a little mama's boy!

Hope Monday is going great for you! Today is my first official day of summer break! Woo hoo!
:)
LTB

A sad day in Toronto

2010-06-26T16:54:00.000-07:00

G20 is here and it has brought out the WORST in my awesome city! I am so disappointed in the people who I share the city with. There are protesters all over the downtown. Protesting peacefully is fine, but this is out of control. Police cruisers are being set on fire all over the city. The riot police are out in full force. Protesters have been breaking the store front windows of thousands of stores and then taking stuff out of the stores and throwing it on the street. A furniture store was totally robbed and now there are chairs and couches in the middle of the road on Yonge Street (our main street!). It is really disgusting. I only live a couple of blocks from where all this shit is happening and I am feeling trapped! All of the subways, buses, roads and stores in the area are in lock down. Protesters are even throwing golf balls at the police horses trying to trip them! That is so sad! Seriously, what is wrong with people!

I hope this ends soon!

LTB

15 weeker

2010-06-24T09:24:00.000-07:00

So...I posted a bitchy post on the weekend about my hubby but of course we made up and i got scared he would read it so it has been deleted. Thank you to those of you who commented.

Also, i'm a couple days late with my 15 week update but here it is....

How Far Along? 15 weeks and 4 days

Maternity Clothes? Lululemons are no longer comfy. This week I bought a pair of regular capri length black tights with a looser waist band to wear with longish shirts. I also got a super cute A-line (there is a tie right under the boobs) shirt and it looks really cute. So that is my newest outfit. Also bought a sports bra, but apparently I again underestimated the size of my new boobs so I have to return it for a bigger one. I am already busting out of my new C cups. A D cup will be entering my future very soon (remember...I used to be an A pre-pregnancy!)

Stretch Marks? No.

Sleep? In general good. Last night I was uncomfy. My stomach and hips were achy. Pregnancy related? Not sure, but I tried to sleep with a pillow between my legs, it just got in the way.

Best Moment of the Week? Being fully "out" at work. I work with a ton of women and currently there are 7 of us all due between Aug and December! One even on my exact due date! It felt really great to chat with all of them and be part of the "club". ha ha.

And....getting our new family car!!! Yippee! We picked up our new SUV last night and I am in love! Finally I'm not embarrased to offer anyone else a ride!

Movement? Can't wait for this to start!

Food Cravings? Not really. Icecream and popscicles but that is probably more heat related than pregnancy related.

Gender? It has been suggested to me by one of the billion preggo ladies at my work that I am having a girl since the HR is always around 158bpm. But who knows! 4 weeks till we find out!

What I miss? Stress free sex, well actually just any sex at all! We have been so incredibly busy and in different places (not together) every weekend and we haven't done it in 2 weeks since our "first time" back at it. And hubs in going camping tonight until Sunday. So i'm out of luck for atleast a few more days!

What I'm looking forward to? School is officially DONE tomorrow and I am FREEEEE for the summer! I'm looking forward to sleeping in, lounging on my beautiful balcony, going to the nearby pool (only a couple times a week since it costs $10 to go but it does have awesome lounge chairs,music, drinks etc.)

And, next OB appt on Monday!

Weekly Wisdom: Pregnancy makes you overly emotional. I cried 3 times this week and I NEVER cry ever! Weird!

Milestones: Coming out of the closet!

Emotions: See above. I'm a crier!

Gotta get back to the final grind. Paper work galore! have a great weekend!

Oh, and booooooo for Italy going out in the World Cup. They sucked this year, and my hubs is OBSESSED with soccer (specifically Italian soccer!). So this will surely put a damper on his mood!

LTB

14 weeks

2010-06-15T16:33:00.000-07:00

How Far Along? 14 weeks

Maternity Clothes? Still in the same old stuff. Mostly Lululemons since I'm not working much these days!

Stretch Marks? No.

Sleep? A lot. I've been going to bed by midnight and since I'm not working I have been sleeping in until 10 everyday! And then lounging in bed until 11 before tackling the day! Life of luxury (for this week atleast!)

Best Moment of the Week? Telling my best friends I am pregnant. They were genuinely happy me except I always sort of feel like my one friend is competing with me and now that I'm pregnant she is going to try super hard to get pregnant with #2 ASAP, just to beat me to it! I know its stupid but we always have had a hidden rivalry I think. But I know she is thrilled for me and I love her so its ok.

Movement? Can't wait for this to start!

Food Cravings? None. But I am not feeling satisfied after my usual breakfast of an orange and and english muffin with a TON of PB. I have been adding a yogurt to ease my hunger. Anyone else pregnant and finding they are hungrier? How/how much food do you add? I've read the 300 calories a day thing but I've also heard that even that is unnecessary? Opinions?

Gender? Hoping girl .... (in the "i'm hoping but will still totally love a boy" kind of way!)

What I miss? Stress free sex. Wiping without fear of the toilet paper inspection that follows everytime! Having to turn the bathroom light on for night time pee breaks (ie. to do the required self imposed toilet paper inspection!)
I am also having a hard time with the 'attention' I'm getting from the inlaws. My mother in law felt it necessary to tell EVERYONE she knows so when I was at a bridal shower on Sunday I felt on display and hated everyone staring at my boobs, telling me my boobs were huge and just the general pregnancy questions and advice makes me feel uncomfortable. I feel like a fraud so it just doesn't seem right.

What I'm looking forward to? Our vacation to South Beach Miami this summer! We rented a sweet condo on the beach for a week! If anyone has tips for what to see and do in SoBe let me know! And pregnancy wise, without getting too far ahead of myself I guess I am looking forward to my next OB appt on the 28th. Really I'm looking forward to my 20weeker so I can find out the sex!

Weekly Wisdom: When you least expect, people can surprise you! As I have mentioned before hubs is a MEGA TIGHT-ASS when it comes to money. He saves every penny or puts it on the mortgage. We need a new car and I was apprehensive about car shopping with him and even though I know I really want a sun roof, heated seats, leather interior and all of that jazz on our new car I didn't think he would go for it due to the extra cost! BUT....at our test drive on Saturday he agreed and totally wants the "sport" version of our vehicle of choice so that we can get all of the fun stuff I want! And he even wants to add a few extra goodies to that! Yippee! We are finalizing the details tonight and should get our new Radiant Silver Hyundai Santa Fe Sport next week! Woo hoo! It will be the first car either of us has ever bought! He has been given all of his cars by his dad and I have never had a car! Very exciting!

Milestones: Telling my besties and my boss at work.

Emotions: Stress ebbs and flows. I feel great most of the time (actually "great" means totally not even pregnant) but I get tons of nervous scares ALOT! I can't wait to feel more pregnant with a real belly and kicks and all of that fun stuff!

Hope you all have a great week! I'm off to the gym and then to get my brows waxed to continue my week of luxury!

LTB

TMI Warning....

2010-06-14T11:14:00.000-07:00

Well, we did it. Finally. We had been told by my super cautious RE not to "do it" until the end of the first trimester. Then my OB said it was ok to do it but to be gentle and watch for spotting. So, I was a bit nervous that it would cause spotting. Also I started realizing that 12 weeks isn't exactly 3 months so maybe we should wait until 13 weeks and then I realized that I turning something wonderful into something horrible. So this week at 13 weeks and 5 days we finally did it. And we were careful and it was awesome. I seriously feel sooooo much closer to hubs when we are happily doing it regularily! Things were getting pretty lame around here with zero action for 3 months! He was instantly in a super mood, and so was I! I read online that orgasms can cause contractions so I told myself I wasn't going to let myself go there. But of course, hubby knows how to push all of the right buttons and before I knew it it was too late! Amazing.
Now, the bad part is yesterday I had a dot of pink when I wiped. Hmmmm....freak out!

It was only one dot and it has not returned so for now I'm relieved but needless to say our plans for a hot sunday evening rendevous went quickly out the window.

So for now I'm happy that I know I still know how to do it! And that it still feels great! But I don't think I'm going to be any less nervous next time. Why is this so hard!!!!??? Ugh.

One thing I really do miss is carefree fun sex with my husband.

Anyways, i'm off to the gym since I have gotten my energy back! Have a great afternoon ladies!

LTB

Dumb Ass Nurses

2010-06-10T10:48:00.000-07:00

So the dumb nurse finally called me back this morning (I called twice yesterday before noon!!!!)
I was at work of course so she let me a snotty message saying "brown is fine" only call me back if it is red or persistent. Since it is neither red nor persistent (It is gone as of about 2pm yesterday) I guess I will just not worry about it (ha ha ha...some kind of joke right!). I sort of feel like lying and saying its red so that I can schedule an ultrasound! She said that's what they would do if it was red. Oh how I miss my RE!

Anyways, after listening to the heartbeat 3 times yesterday and not having any more spotting I do feel more relaxed today.

Another big step today to making this whole thing more "real". I had to tell my boss at work.
We are making the schedules for teaching next year and she offered me a new course to teach that I really want to try but that would mean that when my substitute comes in Dec-June they would have 3 courses to prep for rather than my current schedule of 2. I also didn't think I really need the extra stress of planning a new course in my 3rd trimester of pregnancy (crossing fingers that we get there!!!). I'm also starting a graduate Mathematics program in the fall so I would have a lot on my plate. I knew the boss would wonder why I didn't want to take her up on the offer so I just told her the situation and asked her to keep it hush hush. She was really nice and happy for me and so I felt ok telling her. I was a bit afraid she would take away all of my grade 12 courses since it will be disruptive for me to leave half way through the year but she didn't even mention that. And I personally think that would be total pregnancy - discrimination if she did it!
Anyways, that's it from me!

Have a great Thursday (wow...this week is flying by for me!)

LTB

Calmer and 13 weeks

2010-06-09T15:39:00.001-07:00

How Far Along? 13 weeks

Maternity Clothes? Still not yet. I'm pretty comfy in my Lululemon pants, and 2 pairs of capris that I have that still fit

Stretch Marks? No.

Sleep? Great but waking up in the morning is so much more painful as a pregnant lady than a non-pregnant lady (although...I always HATE waking up early!)

Best Moment of the Week? My sister finding the heart with my doppler and now I totally know how and where to find it! Also it was totally awesome to tell my best friend at work. He knows that we have been trying for a long time and when I told him he was so genuinely happy for me, and he gave me the biggest hug ever! It was really sweet and unexpected.

Movement? Nada. But I can totally feel my ute now! Like when I gently press on my tummy I can feel a hard ball coming up above my pelvis. Its kinda weird!

Food Cravings? Still watermelon...I think its just the season for watermelon and not actually a pregnancy craving!!! I am kind of thinking that pregnancy cravings are a bit of b.s. Maybe during the first months some foods sound totally gross but I don't know about cravings per se. I think sometimes people just use pregnancy as a good excuse to eat things they normally wouldn't allow themselves. But hey, that's just me so far! I might change my tune if suddendly I'm dying for KFC or something! What do you guys think of cravings? Real? What do you crave?

Gender? ?

What I miss? Not being so stressed and worried all of the time.

What I'm looking forward to? The school year to end so I can quit trying to pretend I'm "not pregnant" around my co-workers. My giant boobs and thickening middle are getting harder to hide. I am just not comfortable telling most people at work yet. I am planning to tell my boss in July when school is out.

Weekly Wisdom: Just when you think you can finally breathe and all is going well....the shit will hit the fan! Don't let you guard down!

Milestones: Officially in T2. Finding the heartbeat.

Emotions: I was totally feeling real and pregnant and breathing a sigh of relief....then I got my most recent scare (brown spotting last night after a massage- see my last post). Now i'm back to being a stupid big ball of freak out stress! Thank you all for your supportive and kind comments on my last post. The stupid nurse never called me back. I hate her. I miss my RE. They were always RIGHT THERE to help anytime! And now I feel so alone! The spotting has stopped and it was really light so i'm not freaking out right now. I hope that maybe the massage I had just loosened up some old blood and that it isn't some new horrendous problem. I will call the asshole nurse at 8am to hopefully catch her before she starts seeing patients.

I'm also really excited for this weekend. I have a date with my 3 best friends from highschool (we all live in different cities now) to go to see SATC2 and dinner. I will be making my pregnancy announcement to them! They know we have been trying and i'm excited to tell them our news (as long as I still have good news to tell on Saturday...ie. this spotting is gone and nothing to worry about).

Thanks again everyone for the great comments on my last post! I love yas!

LTB

Massage and Spotting

2010-06-09T10:05:00.000-07:00

I am hating life at the moment. So, last night I went to get a massage. I got a pre-natal massage where they have you laying on your side instead of on your tummy. Then last night (after 3 weeks of glorious blood free days!) I got brown spotting. It's still here this morning. I am so worried. Did I kill my baby by getting a massage? Am I about to end this wonderful dream? I called my OB and am waiting for the nurse to call me back. The spotting is brown and sludge-like and not very much . I have no cramps. To try to ease my mind I pulled out my little home doppler and heard the magical heart beat going at 154bpm. It was awesome. So...essentially I don't think baby is dead ....but I do think something is wrong that can lead to my poor little one leaving us! I hate this stress! So please, cross your fingers that the nurse actually calls me back before I go insane and also that this stupid brown spotting is ok.
Sorry for the downer post. I feel shit.
:( LTB

Houston...we have a heartbeat!

2010-06-07T09:33:00.000-07:00

Yippee! On Friday I visited my sister (the doc) and brought my doppler and she immediately found the baby's heartbeat! I was so happy! And she was quite proud of herself as well! I realized that I was looking for it ALL WRONG. I was pressing WAY TOO HARD! She didn't press at all! And she found it a bit higher than I was looking. And it sounded a lot quieter and different than I was checking for. But now that I know what I'm looking for (and that I don't have to push on my tender tummy like a mad woman to find it) I found it myself last night! So fun to now be able to check up on my little one any time I want to! Because I have to say that other than my thickening middle and giant ta-tas, I don't feel pregnant at all. Not like I have any reference to what feeling pregnant should be but...I feel normal. Full of usual energy. Not extra tired. Not extra hungry. Not nauseous. My headaches are even better. Nothin'. I guess this is good as long as everything is all good inside! Anyways, I'm on the final countdown at work. 3 weeks left (I have to say I'm super jealous of the teachers in the US who I follow that all seem to be done teaching now....I don't get it? When do you start back in the fall? We start back after Labour day so I don't know if that is later than you but I might have to look into moving to the states after hearing about this early finish for summer break!!!)
Ciao for now!!

LTB

12 weeker

2010-06-01T07:04:00.000-07:00

How Far Along? 12 weeks

Maternity Clothes? Nope. Just my old "tight" clothes, lululemon pants (these are my saviours!) and my one size bigger pants. Maternity clothes seem a long way off at this point.

Stretch Marks? No.

Sleep? Good! Not as many pee breaks anymore!

Best Moment of the Week? First OB appt yesterday! And NT scan! My OB was awesome. He is a super nice young gay guy and he is super flamboyant but down to earth and totally made me feel sooooo comfortable. He was recommended to me by a few people and I totally see why! They didn't do much at the appt, just asked a ton of questions and gave me an info package and answered my 10 trillion questions. Then they sent me to ultrasound for my NT scan and then to blood to get the corresponding blood work for the NT screening. I asked them to show me how to use my doppler but they said it was too early to bother with it so just to bring it to my next appt in 4 weeks and they will for sure show me where to find it! Also got the go ahead to STOP THE PROGESTERONE SUPPOSITORIES!!!! However, I'm just so scared to stop them so I am going to keep taking one at night for another couple weeks (just so I psychologically feel ok about it! ) I also got the ok for sex.....now I'm nervous. I know I'm being silly but I'm scared I will bleed when we do it and then I will freak out again. Ugh....
At the NT scan the ultrasound was ON TOP of my belly ! OMG! So happy not to be wanded! And our little baby was jumping around, yawning, sucking his thumb and looking like an actual BABY! The NT measurement was great. Apparently less than 3mm is good, ours was 0.9mm! Of course we have to wait for the blood work to find out our risk of downs syndrome and other trisomies but that measurement is a great start! All in all yesterday was a GREAT day!

Movement? Nada.

Food Cravings? Watermelon! We ate a whole big one just the 2 of us (mostly me!) over the weekend!

Gender? ?

What I miss? Really gross but I have to admit it....I quit smoking cold turkey a year and 8 months ago when I stopped bcp. Now that I'm actually pregnant and I know I CAN'T have a cigarette, I have been craving one! I know I wouldn't have one even if I wasn't pregnant but I think just the fact that I totally CAN'T have one is making me want one more! Plus the patio season is terrible for ex-smokers!

What I'm looking forward to? I don't know! I guess my 20 week u/s (a long way off!!!) to find out the sex!!!

Weekly Wisdom: I got nothin'

Milestones: 12 weeks! End of T1!!!!

Emotions: More relaxed...for now! Oh and this is not an emotion but since being pregnant I am getting a headache EVERY day! And I NEVER usually get headaches! I hate it! I asked about it and he said its normal....and he said I can take Tylenol, but i'm trying to only use that as a last resort!

I feel really lame b/c I have only been posting my weekly updates and haven't been commenting much this week! I have been super busy but now I vow to get back to commenting and supporting all of my lovely bloggie buds!

Oh and one more thing (and an embarrassing one...) Does anyone who has been or is pregnant know what is up with the shooting pains I have been getting occasionally in my vagina? My sister (the doc) says lots of her patients complain of it but I still don't get it. Anyone have any experience with this? Round ligament pain? It's weird.

Gotta get back to work! Enjoy your days! And its already Tuesday!!!!

:)LTB

11 weeks!

2010-05-25T15:46:00.000-07:00

How Far Along? 11 weeks

Maternity Clothes? Not yet but this weekend I wandered into the maternity store but then I quickly ran out because I felt like I really didn't belong. I felt like a kid in a porno shop! I felt like the staff were looking at me thinking what is that little girl (I look pretty young and I was dressed in total grubs so I probably looked extra young) doing in here. I didn't feel "worthy" of being in there just yet. I didn't want to get laughed at! But, I did buy a pair of cheap linen capris for work in a size bigger than I usually get. I wasn't going to buy anything for this awkward stage but I am sick of being uncomfortable in my usual clothes. I did hate buying a size bigger, I think I might have more mental struggles with the body image part of pregnancy than I anticipated. I'll deal with it as it comes!

Stretch Marks? No. But my boobs are veinier (not sure if that's a word...more veins...!)

Sleep? Good. I didn't even wake up to pee last night. But at the same time of course that freaks me out too.

Best Moment of the Week? Going to the gym for a light workout and taking a massive bike ride with hubs and Cosmo on the weekend! I felt like my old self again! But of course...some minor freaking out is trying to sneak up on me because of it.

Movement? Nada.

Food Cravings? Fruit: Melon, cherries, mangos, yummy!

Gender? In laws think its a girl. They really don't have a clue.

What I miss? My cute summer outfits that are out of the question now. I guess I'll have to get some cute pregnancy outfits!

What I'm looking forward to? Getting to hear my baby on the doppler soon, first OB appt on Monday, end of first trimester in a week!

Weekly Wisdom: It's better to splurge a little bit and be comfy than torture yourself in too small clothes.

Milestones: No blood/spotting for a full week!

Emotions: Pretty happy. Irritable though. I seem to be picking on hubby a lot lately and I should stop. But he's such an easy target (no excuse I know!) Plus we haven't had sex in 9 weeks so I fell a bit distant from him. I always feel closer to him and we are just "better" all around when we are having regular sex. I'm nervous for my OB appt because he might say "still no sex", and I'm also nervous he might say, "go ahead with sex". I'm nervous to go ahead b/c what if sex makes me bleed again or what if it is all weird b/c now i'm preggo and we haven't done it in forever! I feel like a virgin again! but maybe that's a good thing!

Well, that's all I got.

Oh, and someone asked how much my doppler was...It was $130 including shipping and we got it in one day. But, still no heartbeat heard as of yesterday.

Hope you guys are having a great week. The weather here in Toronto is so glorious I'm just loving it! I really should be living full time in California where they have this weather permanently!

:)LTB

Doppler....Good or Evil?

2010-05-23T17:58:00.001-07:00

So our home doppler arrived on Friday. We got the Hi Be-be doppler and it says it is supposed to pick up a heart beat "as early as 10-12 weeks". We tried it at 10 weeks and 3 days, no heart beat (except mine!). I know that it was mine since it was only between 60 and 70 bpm. But why the heck can I hear my heart beating in my pelvis? I don't know maybe a vein or something? Anyways, now after trying it 3 times (twice at 10 weeks 3 days and once 10 weeks 4 days) I'm not freaking out yet but I'm realizing that maybe this "comfort toy" we got will end up causing more anxiety! I'm already a bit panicky since since my u/s on Tuesday I have started feeling better, my boobs hurt much less, i have way more energy (I even biked to work on Thurs and Friday and Joe and I went to the gym yesterday and tomorrow we are planning a big bike ride!) . I haven't felt this good in 2 months! So, couple that with the lack of heart beat finding and I'm starting to feel "not pregnant". I'm trying to tell myself it is still early to find the heartbeat, and i'm almost through the first trimester so maybe that is why my symptoms are improving. I just hate not knowing what is going on in there and I thought this silly doppler would solve all of my problems! Silly me! I did luckily move up my OB appt to May 31st when I will be 11 weeks and 6 days. I want to go then because I only have progesterone suppositories for up to 12 weeks and I don't know if I can just stop them at 12 weeks or if we have to wean off of them or what. So I need some OB opinions! Also hoping I'll get him to teach me to use my doppler and get an u/s as well. I'm really excited for that appt. Apparently it is going to take up to 2 hours so i had to take a half day off work...I just told my boss it was a follow up appt to my "problem " a couple weeks ago. We have started telling more people the big news! It's actually pretty fun! Joe told one friend, I told one friend and we told our parents and siblings and a couple aunts too. I feel silly telling though because I don't feel that pregnant (aside from the fact that my pants are becoming very uncomfortable!). The worst thing I hate to hear so far: "oh ya, I can kind of tell.." or "ya, its kind of showing in your face!" WTF! How is my face showing? At only almost 11 weeks pregnant the last thing I want to hear is that you can tell I'm preggers. I can't wait for the actual baby belly to bust out! Dying to be pregnant and not just fat! ahhh.....so many wonderful things to look forward to!
Anyhow, I need to get back to marking my 235 IB math exam papers! UGH! Luckily tomorrow is a holiday in Canada so I have an extra play day to make up for all of the marking I did this weekend!

Enjoy Victoria day all of my Canadian buddies! And US buddies...next week is your turn!!!

:) LTB

10 Weeks

2010-05-20T09:48:00.000-07:00

How Far Along? 10 weeks and 2 days

Maternity Clothes? Nope, but i'm just feeling all over "fuller". Clothes in general are rather uncomfortable. And my bras are over flowing. This weekend I will be on a hunt for new bras.

Stretch Marks? Not yet.

Sleep? Decent. I'm tired being back at work so except for the nightly pee break I'm sleeping well.

Best Moment of the Week? Seeing my baby on the ultrasound on Monday! I saw hands and feel and eyes and nose, sooooo relieved that all is well. Also great was getting my first OB appointment! oh...and I guess telling the inlaws we are pregnant was good too.

Movement? Nope. Except for the mega gas movement!

Food Cravings? Frozen yogurt. All yogurt actually!

Gender? I've started calling the baby "he"....maybe I subconsciously know its a boy!

What I miss? Hard core workouts, not wearing pads (have to b/c of the progesterone suppositories!), my non-bloated tummy (I can't wait for the baby bump but right now the bloat is just gross)

What I'm looking forward to? Getting my home doppler on Friday! And my first OB appt on May 31st!

Weekly Wisdom: Brown blood is old blood. Don't freak out.

Milestones: Moving on to the OB!

Emotions: Lots of anxiety because Tuesday night (after my internal ultrasound) I got more friggin' bleeding! It was brown but I still freaked out! They told me everything was ok and the hematoma was gone so why the hecka am I bleeding! Soooooooo annoying! I freaked, cried, called my sis who is a doctor, and eventually relaxed. No more spotting today. But I hate this a lot. I wish I could just have an easy go at this! I am getting my doppler this weekend and I'm hoping we can hear a heart beat. If not I will bring it to my OB and get him to help me. I think being able to hear the heart between appts will help to ease my anxiety!

So that's it, that's all! Back to marking for me! I have 236 huge IB math exams to mark! ugh....the pile is daunting!

Hope you girls are all having a great week!

:)LTB

QUICKIE!

2010-05-19T10:47:00.001-07:00

I'm SWAMPED at work so this will be fast:
-u/s was amazing yesterday
-measuring perfect at 10weeks
-heartbeat 165
-hematoma is a goner
-transfered to OB now!
-first OB appt on June 7th (but i'm trying to move it up a week!)

I will post a real post later withmy 10 week update and my ongoing problems/worries!

:)
LTB